Transcript
I have a doctorate.
psychology.
Not many of you knew that, did you?
Thank you.
I know all these other geeks go to uni and get their little piece of paper.
I learn on the streets.
Street psychology.
Now before we continue with this tape speech, I want to address the elephant in the room.
Which is me squinting.
It turns out the sun is directly in my face.
My cameraman said, "You should move, the sun's in your face." I scared no fucking sun.
Just pretend I'm looking at your bank.
Thank you.
Tate psychology says,
I've never met a depressed person
who's racist, homophobic and misogynistic.
In fact,
The people who cry about you being those things are the depressed ones. You ever notice that?
That's racist.
Yeah, but you want to kill yourself, so who gives a fuck what you think?
You can't say that. That's rape. That's misogynistic. I might jump off a building.
You should try misogyny.
Fucking hell.
Easier than jumping off a fucking building, isn't it?
I've yet to meet a man who is openly racist and homophobic.
Just goes around saying you're a faggot, you're a faggot, who's depressed?
Maybe it's the cure.
Think about it.
There is a sharp rise...
in depression,
and a sharp decline in the ability to say "faggot."
Does no one else put these two together? Am I the only fucking psychiatrist worth his salt?
All these other fucking nerds going to uni haven't worked out the basics.
Racism.
homophobia, misogyny.
You know, I can't wait till they play this to me back in court.
and I have to defend myself.
And they play it in court and the female lawyer stands there.
Working for the state.
We got you dead to rights.
Shut up, bitch.
They're going to play that part in court too.
Matt, I'm addressing the court now. Court, hello. I know my face is straight.
And I know I'm pretending it was all a joke.
I mean, it's a joke, it's funny.
But I kind of mean it. Just put me in fucking jail then.
Fuckin' just take me to fuckin'
Fucking hell. I'm gonna cry about a joke.
So gay.
I'm depressed because you're not racist.
Anxiety is another one.
Some guy goes to me the other day, "Oh, I've got anxiety." Do you know why you have anxiety? I'll tell you why. I can cure anxiety, right?
You have anxiety because you should be anxious.
Ta-da!
Why is a mouse anxious? Think about it.
A mouse.
Here's a noise.
Because you can kill mice.
You have anxiety because you're broke.
Because you're weak.
'Cause you're a loser.
You're scared of the world, and you should be. Tate might turn up.
You walk through the world anxious, "Hum, let's take over there."
Let's take over there.
Well, take my girl again.
I gave her back.
Whack ass pussy bro.
You're anxious.
Because you're a fucking nobody.
You see,
The bear doesn't get anxious.
If the bear hears a noise, it's like,
calm. Like, is there something I can kill over there?
The mouse thinks a noise, it might kill me.
A bear thinks a noise. I might want to kill it.
It's a different vibe.
So if you're a bear, if you're big and strong and rich and powerful, when you hear noises, you're like, do I need to kill that?
No, it's fine.
Whereas a mouse is like, "Oh!" and runs away.
You're anxious because you're a little weak bitch.
If you went to the gym and got strong and got rich and got important, you wouldn't be anxious anymore.
So by logical extension,
as a medical professional, as the world's most famous psychiatrist.
No psychiatrist. Name a psychiatrist more famous than me on the internet. Name one.
cap
Is it even a disorder? Anxiety disorder.
If it's the natural conclusion,
of your ineptitude.
If you put your hands near fire and you feel heat and you get burnt, is that a disorder? Or is that your body giving you feedback? Stay away from fire.
It's not anxiety disorder, it's your body giving you feedback.
whispering.
Your soul is whispering to your mind.
You're a bitch.
Be afraid.
Be afraid. Every time I meet a man, I've got anxiety. Yeah.
Of course.
I could kill you.
You wouldn't even see it coming!
Even worse, you're just sitting there.
You're a bitch.
Because when you truly reach the highest echelon of masculinity,
Dying ain't so bad.
As long as you die for a good reason.
Dying is not the worst thing that can happen.
Living for nothing is the worst thing that can happen.
Andrew Tate died in a blaze of glory after 55 bullets.
for the right cause.
I'm not anxious about that.
In fact, I'm starting to get a bit pumped.
I'm getting hyped already, I'm just talking about it.
That's what men used to do to go fucking fight for shit.
I'm anxious. They might cut me with their sword.
If you have anxiety,
You're gay.
You deserve your anxiety and you deserve your depression.
Anxiety is cured by a strength,
Depression
is cured via racism.
and to prove
I am the world's leading psychologist
Even though I have no script,
Because it's a good figure of speech, I'm going to go off script.
and ask the Mr. fucking squinty son cameraman who was crying his eyes out
to name a mental disorder and I'll tell you how to fix it. Name one.
Go on.
Go on, Mr. Scared of the fucking sun.
Gone.
Name one.
Homophobia.
That's not mental disorder. That's how you cure disorders. That's a good thing. Name like an affliction of the mind.
that men suffer with. They'll tell you how to fix it. Trans.
Transits.
That's not even a real thing.
Trans is just desperate attention seeking.
mixed with overhorniness.
You know?
When you're not desired at all,
You think, I want to be desired. Women are desired. And I'm jerking off all the time.
and I'm socially awkward, and I'm a retard, fuck it, I'll just become a chick.
Those people, that's Darwinism, bro.
When I see people complaining, "We're giving children sterilizers and they can't reproduce!"
Any parent
that convinces their kid to sterilize at age 11.
That's just Darwinism. Just let them.
You don't want them having kids anyway.
You want to trump your dick off? I'm actually all for it.
I'm totally for it. I'm not against the trans movement.
I want to chop off my balls.
That doesn't get me.
Sure.
All these conservatives, we need to stop this! Why? Let them!
Go chop your fucking balls off, faggot. I don't care.
I'm gonna chop my balls off and be a fag. You're already a fag.
The fact you're even considering it means you're already a fucking homo.
So go!
Do it.
That's not a disorder we need to cure. We can let them do that.
Depression we've cured.
Anxiety we've cured,
We've carried these two.
Name something else. You can't even name anything.
You can't even name anything.
Thank you.
You should be able to name something because you're fucking white.
And this is all white boy shit anyway.
There ain't a brother in Ghana walking around with fucking anxiety.
He's walking around amongst the trenches and the mud and the diseases,
And the crime
flip flops, no money, six baby mamas, doesn't give a fuck.
Just strolling.
In the sun.
Eh.
It is a beautiful day.
No anxiety and nothing give a fuck. You white boys are sitting there at a half a million dollar house.
three Bitcoin and 400 grand in savings.
I wonder if I have enough.
*Gasp*
No wonder you're losing your fucking society. Then you go to a doctor. I feel anxious.
He doesn't say, "Go get strong like the Ghanaian." No, he says, "Oh, maybe your angel."
Anxiety disorder is normal.
sit around the room jerking off together.
Before you know it, you're chopping your own fucking balls off.
And that's my problem.
This is white people bullshit.
And you know it's true.
This is all white people shit.
If I add up,
all the white people I know's lives
and all the black people I know's lives. Personal experience.
The black people I knew
And no.
and their upbringings and their struggles.
and the white people I knew and their upbringings and their struggles. We add them all up. The black people have suffered
Tons more.
But who's going to therapy?
White people.
It's true!
You'll be a fucking white guy. He's like, "Yeah, I grew up and my mom and dad, we grew up together in a nice family home and we all loved each other and yeah, but you know,
There was one time my sister
Took my broccoli and I've just been upset ever since. And I've just been going to therapy for a few years. I'll work it out.
Niggers I know, he's like, "Yeah, I never saw my dad."
Mom was a crack addict.
So yeah.
So yeah.
Ever been to therapy, Dwayne?
Didn't fucking think so.
Thank you.
So your white ass, Mr. Cameraman, can't even name the own afflictions that you white people made up. This is why you're losing your societies to us.
I'll make it right clear you white people are going extinct. You're too fucking-- I'm anxious. Damn right!
Your streets are filled with niggers.
who are gonna rape your chick, take your shit, your taxes are paying for them, they can all beat the shit out of you,
Someone said to me the other day,
You're anti-immigration, but
You're a fighter.
So?
And I'm not actually anti-immigration. I just make fun of white people because you're losing your countries. It's funny.
I'm just laughing at the shit. I'm on the Titanic. I'm playing the violin.
It's going down. It's going down.
I'm the last psychologist on the Titanic. Who's anxious?
faggots.
You white people can swim. I'm a brother. I'm fucking less anxious than you.
Thank you.
Anyway.
You're a fighter. What do you think about Francis and Ghanu?
I think he's a dangerous motherfucker. Why?
He was a homeless immigrant, and now he's UFC champ or whatever it is.
It's like, you think that's,
Advertising for immigration?
That's the scariest thing in the fucking world!
You're telling me these random black people you're letting into the country are the most dangerous men alive?
You're walking around with anxiety in a small dig?
And you think that's something we should let more in? They're gonna kick the living fuck out of you people!
Jesus Christ.
I'll think of a disorder. Let me think of something that people suffer from.
Thank you.
You know what? My black brain won't even let me. Because the answer to all of it is the same.
The answer to all these things is exactly the same.
Oh, sorry, one of my females has arrived.
Hopefully she won't interrupt my filming.
coming over to say how handsome I am.
I'll be there in a second, I'm just filming.
She's white.
Take the white bitches. White bitches are hot. Take the white girls. They're hot.
Take all the white girls from the white men. What are you going to do about it?
Look at that. Go on.
Go away there.
No Dr. Umar up in here, I'll take a white bitch all day.
We can do nothing.
And Ghanu's gonna take your bitch. What are you gonna do? Nothing. What are you gonna do?
See you in court, Buster!
Gay as fuck.
So anyway.
To conclude,
Because I guess I'm busy now.
babies to make.
Only that's another thing you motherfuckers don't do, make babies.
I had sex with a girl and I used a condom.
So she can't get pregnant.
- Yeah, well done, buddy.
No wonder you have no fucking civilization left. No wonder the birth rates plummeted.
and you wonder why your cities aren't white anymore.
Heh, she was on birth control and I used a condom and I had a vasectomy so I could have a wild ride, bro.
You are gay.
You are gay!
So yeah.
White people are gonna go extinct.
It's an abstract, look, it's a basket of ideas.
It's how my mind works.
Let me explain your brain and my brain.
I see the interconnectivity of everything.
Your brain
imagines an animal.
Like a mouse.
Thank you.
When I think of a mouse, I think of the food chain.
I think of the web.
I think the things that eat the mice.
and what the mice eats.
and the mice's habitat. Do you understand?
You have a one-track mind.
You can't sit down and talk about racism, homophobia, depression,
anxiety, mice, bears, and white hoes in one video and make it make any sense at all. I'm the only fucking human alive who can do that.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Hope they're still playing this part in court.
Hello, Judge.
Judge, I was being funny.
Hi, prosecutor.
Thank you.
Prosecutor, look across, look at me now. Look at me right now. Look at me.
Your honor, it was a joke.
-
you
Outro Music.