Transcript
.
cloud.
cloud.
I'm tired of every motherfucking
I have.
Every computer I fucking use trying to get me to save shit.
on the cloud.
The fucking, the cloud is just someone else's computer.
That's all the cloud is. I've got my hard drive here, but if I put it on the cloud, it's someone else's hard drive.
"Oh great, let me just save all my shit on someone else's computer."
Listen,
There will become a time in your life where you're going to get arrested and you need to know exactly what's on your phone. And you need to be able to throw that phone away down a sewer drain and know everything's going to work out. You don't need every text message you've ever sent and every picture you've ever taken saved on someone else's fucking computer on some fucking cloud. Attached to your Apple ID with your fucking name and address from your credit card. All that shit's going to tie up and put you in fucking jail.
It's garbage. Stop asking me to save things on clouds.
I save my shit on my fucking hard drive so I know where my things are.
The cloud is just someone else's computer. It's bullshit and they're going to come for you and they're going to use it against you sooner or later.
Apple, I've got an iPhone.
and an android of Goldblum.
But they're fucking desperate. They keep messaging me. Oh, you can back it up at the cloud. Oh, let's keep track of everywhere you've ever been on the cloud. Oh, let's fucking record your dick size on the cloud. Fuck off with the cloud. I don't see how it benefits my life. Oh, if I get a new phone, I can download all the same photos again.
You know, I don't do that anyway. You know why? Because I live in the fucking future. I live in the present. I don't live in the fucking past. Any photos I want are on my Instagram.
Any other photos in my phone of a whole bunch of fucking naked chicks? Because that's all it is on my phone is pussy and tits. You know what I do? I buy a new phone. I don't sit and think, I need to transfer my photos. I think I'll find some new pussy and some new tits. I'm not going to live in fucking basking in the glory of my previous accomplishments like some kind of little bitch. I don't need to move photos. I'll just fucking buy a new phone and make some new fucking photos.
Fuck the cloud.