Transcript
- Good morning.
How was your sleep?
How are you feeling, D-Gen?
were talking in your sleep you were saying very strange things something about b and b bridging
And Solana, what's Solana?
Anyway, welcome back to the real world. Welcome to the real world where you have to do some work. That's right, where you need a job. The real world.
Because in the real world,
There is something called karmic retribution. You know, I actually explained this to a lesbian.
with a shit blonde mullet.
She had something to do with crypto.
that God is quite careful with what he gives and what he takes away.
I like to believe.
that the moral arc of the universe bends towards balance.
You know? That you get what you deserve and you don't get what you don't deserve.
Call me sentimental.
But it's a nice way to look at the world.
The bad things that happened to you, you deserved them.
Because you're fucked up. And the good things that happen to you,
You deserve them too because you earned them.
because you earned them, because you worked for them.
Not because you bought a coin and waited.
but because you actually
Worked.
And this is the problem with crypto as a whole.
You people think.
If I buy this coin and sit and do nothing, I'll be rich.
But how does that fit in with God's karmic plans?
Why would God...
give an easy way out to a dipshit like you.
When there's people,
who are working and struggling and dedicating themselves
All day every day. Don't they deserve a way out?
They deserve a hard way out.
let alone an easy way out.
But no, he's not gonna give a way out to the people who dedicate themselves. He's not gonna give a way out to the hard workers.
He's gonna be the way out to you because you bought a coin and now you spend all day on Twitter and jerking off. Nah.
Doesn't make sense.
And then I wake up and I see the crypto price and I just...
Told ya.
Told ya!
No fucking way.
Was God gonna make a pencil dick?
skinny arm dweeb like you rich for holding magic internet money. Couldn't happen.
Good night.
You gotta dedicate yourself. You gotta struggle.
Go to war!
You know what I love about crypto dumping?
When Solana was high.
a couple weeks ago.
There'd be some little nerdy dipshit saying to me,
Hey, bro!
So how much is the servicing on a Bugatti, bro?
Thank you.
Not anymore.
Not anymore. You can't afford one. You know what? I'm rich without crypto. I'm really rich.
I have real businesses, real things, like penthouses.
Stocks, bonds, you know, land, gold, all that other shit. Yeah, I have hundreds of millions of dollars of crypto. I have crypto, but I also have real shit. You don't.
So I'm now the only rich guy on the internet.
which is what I love about crypto dumping, because all these other rich people
Start pissing their little panties.
My Solana coins!
My Solana coin! Have you seen the price of Solana?
Fucking hell
Don't cry.
God is never going to make you rich unless you work for it. He's never going to make you rich for holding trash. I know what you're about to say to me.
Because I can think what you think, much like I can anticipate the musings of a dog or a cat or any other lesser being.
You think you do work.
You're like, I don't just hold it because I do work. I work for my bags. I'm on Twitter. I read all day about Bitcoin. I read about the blockchain. I read.
Listen.
It's actually amazing to me. It's really amazing to me how fucking stupid you people are.
I once sat down, had a long conversation with a guy about Bitcoin.
who knew more than me,
I know the blockchain.
I know how it works.
I understand there's a certain number of them.
I know more can't be printed from thin air. I know who Satoshi Nakamoto is. I know who Michael Saylor is.
I get it. I can send Bitcoin, receive Bitcoin. I get it.
My man's talking about the hash rate.
The mining!
I'm not worried you'll earn all this. Do you mind?
No, I read it.
Why'd you read it?
Well, if you're going to invest in something,
Better know about it. Better know all about it, you know?
I was like, not really.
Not really.
I mean, I spend all my time working and making a whole bunch of money. So if I half believe in something like Bitcoin, I can just buy it.
How does Bitcoin work?
There's a certain number of them.
So it can't be inflated.
and people want them.
All right, I'll buy some.
I'm done. Sold. I'm done. That's it.
So this motherfucker spent years learning about everything Bitcoin. So how many Bitcoin do you even have?
Almost got two.
Having two bitcoins is like having two wives. It's fucking pathetic.
Pathetic!
I was like, "I have over 500 Bitcoin, I don't even know what this shit is you're talking about. Why were you reading this shit instead of getting a fucking job?" Get a job and buy more. If you really believe Bitcoin's going to the moon, you should be panicked to work and buy as much as possible, but instead,
You believe Bitcoin's going to the moon?
So you want to read about it to give yourself hopium so that you can jerk off imagining a future where you're rich with the tiny amount of Bitcoin you have, because you don't want to work.
This is a very clear distinction between a warrior who believes and goes to work to get more and a pussy who believes
So he gives himself hopium, jerks off, and prays for a day where he can pay his bills.
Do you understand?
I have more of the coins
that I don't even understand how they work.
than you do and you probably read about it all day.
And when it goes to zero, I don't give a fuck.
I can buy more. You can't. What you need, sir, is a job.
What you need, sir, for income is a job.
Bye.
God is never going to give you an easy way out.
There's never gonna be a time you send an email to a celebrity and say,
$50,000 isn't even money to you and it would change my life. And the celebrity go, go, okay.
Because I get those all day. That's never going to happen. You're never going to win the fucking lottery. You're never going to hold a coin that just goes to the moon. None of it's ever going to happen.
The only way out is shit.
And you come out covered in bruises, scrapes, bumps, scars, you name it. You're going to fight through the brambles. The only way out is hard work. That's the only way out.
Crypto people just don't seem to fucking get it.
I love
Nothing makes me happier than Bitcoin and crypto crashing.
Fucking much.
I know what you're thinking.
Andrew.
*snoring*
*sigh*
You have hundreds of millions of dollars of crypto. Don't you worry about your crypto portfolio? And the truthful answer is,
No.
Because I would prepare, I would happily cut off my nose to spite my face.
I am perfectly prepared to lose it all.
as long as you lose it too.
I don't need it.
On a gift sheet.
I'm still rich.
If I lose my crypto, I don't sit and go, "Shit, I lost my crypto." I go,
Yes!
They lost their crypto.
Yes!
But Andrew, you lost hundreds of millions. It doesn't matter.
He lost his grandma's house.
He lost his girl's dreams. Remember when you got engaged?
We're gonna go to Moldean's when my Solana coins go up.
Baby!
All your dreams are crushed.
She's already looking at other men. Get paranoid. Go check her phone. Go check her phone.
Right? Go check her out. I'm telling you, she sold the Solana price. She's on her way. One foot out the door. You notice she's acting a bit strange lately?
went to bed in a bit of a mood, doesn't want to fucking suck your dick anymore.
Yeah.
That's right.
Time's running out.
Nothing makes me happier than this shirt.
Because you...
Unlike me.
have no money to buy the dip. Because when crypto is high,
You're sitting around jerking off on hopium. I'm working as hard as possible to buy more during a dip. So I have money. You don't have any fucking money because you were too busy reading about the hash rate and being convinced that Bitcoin was going to 10 million a fucking coin.
Hey bro, do you know Ripple's gonna replace Swift? Ripple's gonna $300,000- Bro, I'm already retired. I'm pre-rich.
You are gay!
You are gay!
You are gay!
Remember when you told?
your mother that you'd retire her,
Remember when you promised your girl you'd take her somewhere nice?
Thought you'd get a nice new car, some clothes. Remember all those dreams?
I went down with the chart.
Remember them all?
Remember?
Guys, let me tell you why you all deserve to be poor.
Three weeks ago.
I was on Twitter.
And I saw a long thread
explaining to me
How?
Because it was a parody of traditional financial instruments.
and a cult community.
that one of the best investments
I could use
To enhance.
The.
quantity
of my hard-earned income.
was
Fart coins.
Somebody wrote a long, long--
Threat out.
about how because it parodies traditional financial instruments,
and there's a cult community around it.
that the best thing I can do with my money is buy fart coin.
And there was a whole bunch of comments underneath it.
He's right holding the bag.
And you think--
You people deserve to be poor!
Guys!
Karmic retribution. Hello.
Full circle!
God has fucked you because you needed it. You deserved it.
There were people underneath it. This actually makes a lot of sense.
Fucking hell.
God is not going to let you get rich off fart coin.
God won't.
Forget the charts, forget Solana. God won't.
I know you see these PNLs where you feel like everyone else does.
But that's not real. That's the Matrix. That's Fagazzi.
It's kind of like Taiwan.
Does Taiwan really exist right now?
I'm not in Taiwan.
Is Taiwan even there? Or do the graphics render in real time as I get to the edge of my vision? You understand what I'm saying? All those P&Ls is bullshit.
I know you believe him.
That's the simulation fucking with your head. It's bullshit.
Not that's real.
It's just a simulation keeping you there.
Click it on Photon.
And I know you motherfuckers thought you were so smart. This is another thing I have to bring up. Sorry, guys. You guys thought you were so fucking smart.
You'd sit down with someone like me
who makes money lots of different ways. I do crypto, but I do traditional things. I'd say, oh yeah, you know.
Just pulled off a 600 million dollar real estate project.
Real estate.
I don't do real estate. It's illiquid.
Not really. What do you do?
Huh, heard of Phantom?
Yeah?
Ha! Heard of Photon?
Yeah? I connect my phantom to my photon.
I buy Solana coins.
Oh, very interesting. Fucking entrepreneur.
Is that-- what is that, gambling?
high risk investments.
You're a faggot.
Thank you.
And I'm very glad that you're all going poor now.
I woke up in one of the best moods ever.
The moral of the story here is, gentlemen,
Thank you.
In fact, let me give you a visual demonstration.
with Ferrero Rocher.
*clap*
This is you.
Thank you.
Before you,
are a few different paths. Let's make
The path's candles.
Why not?
Okay.
Bye.
Path one.
Is that crypto's bullshit?
and it's all going to zero.
Let's hope not, eh?
Path two is that crypto goes to the moon,
and you spend all day sitting on the little bit of crypto you have,
hoping that one day you'll be rich. And path three
is you understand crypto is going to the moon, so you need to stop reading about crypto.
Stop jerking off. Stop telling everyone about crypto. Stop trying to explain to your aunt why her 401k is not a good investment, because it doesn't help you and it doesn't help her. No one gives a fuck and you're ruining dinner.
Just stop and instead get a fucking job and make some money to buy more crypto so that when it finally goes up, you actually have real wealth.
These are the three options.
And if you don't make a choice, what you're going to end up doing
is a combination
Thank you.
of one and two. We're going to be sitting here somewhere. Most of you are here.
And I promise you,
That the worst thing about being here is.
Even if you're right and crypto goes up.
The people who worked hard are still going to be.
You can't escape the hard work.
If you try to escape the hard work, you get crushed. Like a pancake.
The only way out...
It's hard work and dedication.
I don't want to hear any more about holding your bags. That's not a fucking job. Scrolling Twitter is not a fucking job. Writing in a telegram group is not a job. Writing on Discord is not a job. Reading about how the Swift system is going to be replaced by Ripple and jerking off, coming all over yourself, dreaming of an imaginary world where your $400 is to become $4 million fucking dollars is not a fucking job. None of it's a job. A job is where you build something that matters. It's where you dedicate yourself to something that exists.
because no matter how much bag holding or Twitter scrolling you do, when the price of your coin goes down, you end up poor. Whereas if you had a job and you were actually working, you would have something built. Even half a house is still a house.
So none of you have done any work in years.
This crypto dump.
It's God's karmic retribution.
The people who have been inside of the real world dedicating themselves to have cash flow.
to be paid cash money every month will now have money to buy the dip.
and the people who were sitting on their bags
are here to be replaced.
You're going to lose.
Even if the coins go back up, you're going to be replaced
financially by the people who were working.
Because it is hard work and dedication.
So.
Enjoy this dip.
For what it is.
But if you have a brain,
If you understand what I just said to you,
If you want to get paid money every single day, cash money that you can use,
to take your girlfriend to the mall.
to invest in real estate or
Buy more Solana.
Who gives a fuck?
Money, actual money.
If you understand that God is waiting for you to make this decision, because until you do, he will only dangle wealth in front of you to give you a boner.
Just to give you a little bit.
You know? The candle.
The carrot will be there.
Maybe, maybe, no.
You're never going to get it.
until you finally decide
that you're prepared.
to join the real world.
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