Transcript
*Mario plays*
Let me tell you what's fun about having 12 cars. People say, why do you need 12 cars?
And I say, listen, amateur,
You don't actually need 12 cars. You don't need one car.
Effectively, you could take the bus, right? So a car is a luxury and 12 cars is a super luxury, especially when they're all high performance luxury cars. However, they are all slightly different. And what's fun about having 12 cars, because people say, don't you get bored of just driving different cars? No, because every single one is slightly different.
which means they're all slightly good or slightly better than the others at different things.
So I get to choose the perfect car for the job. Sure.
I could have an all-rounder car like most shit munchers do.
Or I could wake up and go, "What am I doing today?" I'm going on a long drive.
through the mountains. It's about two days through the mountains. Lots of windy, beautiful roads, but I need handling, I need grip, and I need space in the back. Let me take my Ferrari 812 Superfast 6.5 liter V12 812 horsepower.
perfect grand tour.
"Oh, I'm going to the opera. Well, I have an Aston Martin Vanquish S. Only 175 in the world. Drop the top. I'll take the Aston."
.
Oh, I'm going to go racing with my friends around town. No problem. Well, I want to smoke them all. So let me take my McLaren 720S.
all want to go flexing on the broke boys. No problem.
Pink.
Candy. Lambo.
Candy Floss Roof Down Spider.
Do you understand? I could flex on the broke boys in my super fast.
But around town, it's not its strengths. Its strength is long drives through the mountains. And the Lambo is uncomfortable after many hours. So its strength is short-term flexing on the broke boys. I could use one car for both, but if I have different cars...
They're each individualized to the task.
I got too many bitches.
happens.
Don't need a two-seater. No problem with that. M5, lowered, race to 900 horsepower. Throw them all in the M5. Show them some.
Oh,
What about this? I'm going to go to a business meeting. I'm going to go meet Stefan Strauss in Frankfurt.
Talk about $10 million. I'm going to pull up in my Porsche 911 992. It will get me there fast, reliable, it's quick, but it ain't too flexy. You can go to a business meeting in a Porsche.
Do you understand what I'm saying? I can't go to a business meeting in my candy floss pink Lambo.
Do you understand the slight differences? So you fuckers are like, why do you need all these cars? Because I live a diverse life and I'm a diverse man. And every day I wake up and I look at all the different weapons I have at my disposal. So I'm going to play in a video game. Do I want the machine gun? Do I want the sword?
Do I want it? Yeah, they all kill.
Some are better.
slightly than others, depending on the situation. And this is why I have 12 cars. Every single one of my cars, there is a scenario in which I prefer that car over the others.
And when I find a car which is perfect for them all, which of course is impossible, then I won't need 12 cars. But as it stands, I need all 12 because they're all good at different things.
I was going to extend this tape speech and talk about how
The same applies to women like
One bitch can cook. When you're hungry, you call that bitch. You want a blow job, you call that bitch. You want to fuck, you call that bitch. The house needs cleaning, you call that bitch.
But I don't want anyone to think I'm sexist or misogynist.
So I won't do that.