Transcript
Alright guys, everybody has asked for it, you're now getting it
I have your guy Tristan Tate
How you doing, my man?
I'm always doing wonderful.
Enjoying Dubai, having some fun here.
You know, living the way I live. - Yep, too much fun. We've had too much fun.
No such thing. Ah, no such thing. So today there is a couple of points I want to cover with you.
The first one is a big beef that I actually get in my comments when I talk about being a gentleman. So I want to start this whole thing off with
clarifying because I'll get messages bro and they'll be like, "You hang out with Tate's, you ought to know that opening doors means you're a sep!" and I'm like bro, you have no idea. So I just want you to speak to
Gentlemen game when it comes to frame and how you run your day-to-day operations? Well, first of all, you have to clarify what a simp is and what simping is.
Being nice isn't simping. To me, I have a very unique
Uh,
description of what simping is. I think it's an unfair exchange of value.
between a man and a woman, usually coming from a man towards a woman. So giving a woman a bunch of free money, giving a woman a bunch of Instagram likes, giving a woman a bunch of Instagram comments. That is simping if she's not doing it back to you.
I mean, you'll see me comment you look beautiful on a girl's Instagram picture.
And she'll reply underneath it, you know, I miss you, Tristan.
That's not simping. That is a fair exchange of value. I'm publicly telling people, you know, I've been there. That's that's one of mine. And, you know, I get the validation in return.
I don't think there's anything wrong.
If you're...
If you were just some guy waiting at the entrance to a restaurant for any woman to walk past and holding the door open in the hope of getting some phone number or something, that really is simping. But no, it's an exchange of value. And being a gentleman is very, very important.
There doesn't have to be a winner.
When you're going on a date with a woman, and you're looking to sleep with her, and she's looking to have a good time, you can both go home happy.
You really can. You don't have to feel like you defeated her somehow or you tricked her somehow. And she doesn't need to feel like she used you somehow. Right.
You can have a wonderful evening, you're nice to her, you open the car doors, you buy her a bouquet of flowers, you have dinner, you make love, you go home, she's happy, you're happy.
Then you can delete your phone number if you want. But it doesn't need to be a winner. But, you know, and it's super important that I think that you say that and people hear you say this because I think a lot of guys think...
that opening doors, buying dinner,
Grabbing a flower, you know, and I don't grab a lot of flowers and I haven't seen you grab a lot of flowers, but dinner sending an Uber. Yeah.
um opening doors being polite guiding her to the table opening the chair
You know, doing those type things. I've seen you do quite a bit and it doesn't seem to be broken to me, cowboy. So. Well, well, essentially, do you want her to have a good time and do you want her to like you?
I think it's because of the business that I worked in. People assume that, you know, me or my brother are very rude to women, are very mean to women, because men can't wrap their head around the fact that there are some men out there who just have beautiful women who want to have sex with them or want to work for them or want to get naked on webcam in their house and make them a bunch of money. Men can't work it out in their mind.
So they think I must be doing something mean. I must be tricking them, beating them,
Getting them addicted to drugs, screaming at them, rude to them.
But that's 0% who I am.
It's just people who don't understand the frame of being a top-tier guy. But there's absolutely nothing wrong with being nice. If you're a fat loser at work and you're, you know,
buying flowers for all your coworkers, and opening doors there, all right, you're simping.
Unfair exchange of value. Believe me, I get more value by the end of the night.
that she gets from me.
Because...
I get her naked in my bed. Right. I'm perfectly happy to open the door. It's wonderful. You know, it's beautiful. I want her to have a good time. I want her to want to come home with me. And I think we'd all agree, I'll open the hell out of some doors for that. Oh, absolutely. You know? No problem.
And, and...
the big, strong, tough Andrew.
Tate.
Same way, wouldn't you say? Absolutely. Absolutely. Why would he not open doors? And he's absolutely charming. He's nice and he smiles and he'll pick up a tab or whatever. And I just I think it's I think that some guys, a lot of guys actually in the space have an unhealthy
idea
of what simping versus being a gentleman is, and the value of taking the masculine role as a gentleman, as opposed to
looking insecure by not.
- I think, yeah, they see
guys like
me or you or Andrew as bad guys.
because they have nothing to give a woman but loyalty.
So they'll look at guys who have multiple women like me and they'll think Tristan's a bad guy. Women like bad guys.
And they do. They like top-tier guys, and top-tier guys tend to like having more than one woman. But women don't like rude guys. There's no universal... I mean...
I could probably pull it off if I wanted to, but I wouldn't go on a date and not say much, sit on my phone, be rude, walk in front of her.
Make her split the check.
and expect her to come home and make love at the end of the night. That certainly is going to hinder my chances.
And that's the whole point of going on a date.
So it's just a lack of understanding of what it's like to be a top-tier male. So anytime anyone says any stupid comment like that to you, "Oh, the Tate's wouldn't open doors," or, "Why are you opening doors that's simping?"
That guy doesn't get laid.
You know he doesn't. Oh, no. He holds doors open. Yeah What's funny to me is like I already know these things right? Yeah, so if I get a message and somebody's like well I thought you hung out with the Tates. Don't you know better? I'm like dude. I
You have no idea what you're talking about. And so, and that was, to me, I'm like, okay, me and Tristan are going to do this. Let's clarify this.
Because I think there's a lot of young guys that haven't really, really got deep into dating. They might go in with all the wrong impression and blow a girl out immediately when it really wasn't that necessary.
So if we're trying to be helpful, I think clearing that up is super important. Yeah. And another point you touched on that we really should clear up is sending an Uber, paying for a taxi, paying for dinner. That's just the way that gender roles have been for the, for as long as
Dating has been around. Right. I mean, when I was young and flat broke,
'Cause people will say, oh, you pay for the Ubers. Or maybe I'll even get a girl flight ticket to come to Bucharest, to come to my house and see me. And people will say, that's simping. I'm like, well,
for the price of the flight ticket, you don't know what I'm getting. But when I was young and broke, there was obviously no gold digging involved. I didn't have a, I slept on a mattress on the floor. But if a girl was coming around to see me at night, I'd pay for her taxi, my last five, six, seven pounds.
because it's seven pounds and I get eight hours of entertainment. So again, it's a very fair exchange of value. And I think that if you want to
act tough and, you know, hold frame and ask a girl to split a bill or, you know, make a girl pay for her own taxi and don't even offer. If she does go to bed with you,
She's
a low quality woman. She's just some dickhead hoe who would do anything for dick.
And some guys may get laid that way, but you certainly wouldn't with the quality of women that I hang out with.
I would actually even go as far as say if you ask a girl to split a bill with you, you're actually giving up ground that you could have taken as masculine frame. Yeah. You know?
I would agree. And where I'm from in Eastern Europe,
If a girl offers to split the bill, which they don't, but if a girl does offer to split the bill, it means I see you as my friend.
This is not a date.
So if a woman ever says, hey, can I...
pay for half the drinks. That means, Tristan, I'm not interested, I only see you as a friend. It's a defense mechanism, I'd say. So you're doing it to yourself. Oh, we're just friends. That's what you're trying to signal. You're putting yourself in the friends zone. Yeah, by telling her to split the bill with you.
Which is stupid.
It's very stupid and let's be honest, not a lot of guys go to the places I go.
What's splitting the bill? $30, $40? Right. And you're seriously going to try and...
impress me with this bullshit, I made her split the bill.
I guarantee you didn't do anything else with her that night. - Right. - I know what you didn't split. - Exactly. And if you did,
then you probably ain't worth keeping. Yeah, you probably just didn't even need to buy her dinner. Probably could have done a McDonald's drive-thru and got your dick sucked in the car. And it would have worked just as well. You could have.
Could have Netflixed that, homeboy.
All right, good. Good. So I think we both agree that being a gentleman in the right frame is really, really important. But I've also...
seeing you be a gentleman when it's time to let a girl go.
like out the door. And I think that's super important. And what I like so much about the thought process behind doing that, and when I do that, I've seen you do that, is that if you do it like a gentleman, you kind of live in her dreams a bit.
You're kind of FDBing from a place where she can't even be mad at you. Now all she can do is think about how kind you were to her and the gentleman that you were. Can you speak to that at all?
Well, there are two different circumstances you're talking about. One, if she stays the night with you and you're letting her go in the morning.
and two,
If she's not going to have sex with you, and you could tell, and she's not going to spend the night with you, and you say, you know what, let me put you in a taxi, walk her to the car, open the door, let her go. What people need to understand is 90% of the time, or 99% of the time,
Women have decided whether they're going to have sex with you before the date.
They really have, you know, whether their loves are shaved. Exactly. Exactly. So you spoke to her. She finds you charming.
she'll think you know what there's a possibility i'm gonna this guy tonight she'll put on her best lingerie
You know, like she said, shave your legs, get ready. And if she's got ready, you have a very, very good chance of having sex. But there are some times where I've been on, you know, I've been talking to a girl for maybe a month.
and we have our second date or first date. And I'm like, you know what, this one's in the bag. And it gets to 11 o'clock and she's like, you know what, I'm gonna have to get up early tomorrow, I should really get a taxi home.
I'm the least pushy man. There's nothing attractive about being pushy, because you don't understand her. Maybe she's on her period, and she doesn't want to have sex with you. Maybe it's vulgar to a lot of guys listening, or you don't want to hear, but maybe she's on her period. It's that time of the month, and she thinks, "You know what? I'd love to fuck Tristan, but I'm just not going to do that tonight in his house. I'd be embarrassed. I'd be ashamed." Me being pushy,
It's just gonna make me, it's just gonna undo the month of hard work that I've done, being charming and being nice and being kind. Because I'm not getting laid.
so uh...
First circumstance, you don't go home with her. Yeah, always be a gentleman. Don't worry, let me get you a taxi home.
Because why would you...
burn the hard work you've done.
and not bother setting up a second date.
But it's not just that.
I would just rather be nice.
It's so much easier that way and it's so much natural that way. And I think if you push it and it's ever unnatural, it doesn't work. Now,
On top of that, I'd like to hear more about how you're a gentleman when you actually break up with a woman.
because that's what I'm really getting at behind the question of how you kind of live in her dreams a little bit. Because if you go out like a gentleman, I'm really big on never showing a woman emotion. I feel like if you show a woman emotion that she will look at you in a weaker way.
way. So I've seen you break up with a girl in person. You've seen me break up with a few. Yeah, one or two. I've seen a couple of Tristan's breakups live. They're not boring. Fireworks are out. But, you know, speaking on being a gentleman, why it's important to be a gentleman on the light side of it and then the dark side of it when you have to either
control the frame, be firm, or just thought out, let a girl go. What can you say to that? Well, you know, most of the time I, I'm always running multiple women at the same time. And, you know, I've broken up with main chicks and they, they can be messy, complicated situations. But a lot of the time when I break up with a girl who I've been seeing for a few weeks, a few months, um, you know, good girls who've been loyal to me, you know,
they are my girlfriend, I've got plenty, but they essentially for all intents and purposes are my girlfriend. I don't see the reason
to burn bridges
One. Two, to create a negative reputation for myself.
especially in the city I live in, two. Three, to upset people.
any more than necessary because if you call a woman every name you want to call her and spit in her face
She's going to forget about you within a day. She's going to be like, you know what? All that nice time I spent with Tristan, he showed his true colors tonight. That's who he really is. He was faking. Yeah. You're going to make that lasting bad impression.
I always like to leave with a lasting good impression.
and also,
You have to understand that when you want to be a playboy in a certain city, so I live in Bucharest, Romania,
Girls will ask girls who've slept with me, been with me, spent time with me, what's Tristan? He's such a nice guy, had such a good time with him, maybe he wasn't ready for something serious. He was a bit of a cheater, but he was always wonderful. Exactly. What they won't say is, "He's a psycho, he threw me out of the house." There's no advantage to doing that.
Now I live in Eastern Europe, but especially in the Western world,
You know, you throw a girl out of your house and upset her too much, she might just "Me Too" your ass.
So all these tough guys out there who want to treat women bad, I would advise against it in every single way.
And once again, there's not a single...
Okay, there are. But there aren't many of my exes that I couldn't get back with if I tried. Right. It's a boomerang. They do come back. And I see them watch my Instagram stories. And as you increase your value and status and influence as a man...
and their value, status and influence goes down as a woman,
they watch you in
I'm going to actually digress.
There is a way to get revenge on women.
Every time I've heard anyone say, "Oh, my ex broke up with me. She cheated on me. I need revenge. I need revenge."
That's sick minded, that's incel level shit. The only kind of revenge that you can get on a woman is this. - Ever. - Say goodbye politely.
Keep working hard.
Increase your value as a man.
wait three years, four years, six years, 11 years, and you know this story, the 11 year story, and wait 'til you are the man
And she's just now some chick, 28, 29. And she's like, Tristan, you know, it should have always been you.
then you can either
Tell her no.
or break your heart again. - Yep. - Then you win. - Yep. - That's the only way to get revenge. - Yep. - You gotta keep working on yourself, and keep working on your status. - It truly is. - Yeah, yeah. - And you've seen me pull that one. - I have seen you pull that one. I've pulled that one myself a bit. And you know, there's probably not a better feeling in the world than that. - No, there isn't. - And you know, not that I was ever mad at the girl.
it's just a reflection of what you're able to become as a person. Absolutely. You know, and you might have started off with that...
lady feeling like you know you guys were equal or in some way that y'all had something special and you broke apart and maybe that hurt Maybe it didn't but to but to come full circle and to have her come back around and it'd be completely lopsided. Yeah from a value perspective is is
is
not fulfilling so much because it's hurting the girl, because I don't really, I don't hate women at all. We should talk about that. But really just because of what you did as a person. Yeah. It's self-indication. The most, the only thing I can liken it to is, you know, taking a bad whooping in a kickboxing match and coming back and beating the same guy a year later, two years later. It's like, ah, I've become much better than you. I'm better. I'm now better at this than you are. Exactly. So enjoy defeat. Exactly. Yeah, it's cool. Let's talk, let's talk
- Yeah.
are either giving up
or maybe even some guys in the Red Pill space that are angry. I have to say with all my heart, I have zero
hard feelings towards women at all. No, same. Zero. Um,
I am well aware of nature.
But at the same time, I feel like if you really understand nature and you do what you have to do, you can navigate through that. And I'll quote you here. You can make women the spice of life or the sprinkling on top of a life that you've already built. So what is your thought process in regards to maybe the nature of women, modern women, how you navigate that in your mind to make sure that you never get angry with the situation? Because I know that you don't. What is your thought process and framework?
your own head around that.
Well, I think a lot of it has to come down with. I mean, success with women is much like success in business or success in sports.
It's down to you. It's personal accountability. And that's what a lot of guys want to throw out the window these days. And what they want to do is they want to blame women.
It's like failing in every business you've ever attempted, and failing to make money, and then blaming capitalism.
Or failing in every boxing match or every American football game, an NFL game you've ever played, and blaming the referees, or blaming the rules.
No, it's personal accountability and it's personal responsibility. And when you see guys out there who say like all women are garbage...
I believe them.
Because I believe all the women they get to meet are garbage. Right. Because they're bottom feeders. They're low tier men. And they're attracting low tier women.
and low-tier people of all sorts attract each other.
Low tier men have low tier male friends, they get low tier girlfriends. And I believe the women they meet are garbage. They don't get to operate at my level and they don't get to see how wonderful women truly are. Because I'm picking the fruit at the top of the tree.
So I think a lot of these guys need to really, really look in the mirror, as I do.
And sometimes I look at myself and think, "Tristan, okay, you're a little out of shape."
Tristan, okay, you've been sleeping too much, you've been partying too hard, you've got bags under your eyes, you've been, you know, you're letting yourself go a bit, and you have to keep yourself in check. You have to stay at the very top, and if you don't stay at your very top,
you're not competitive anymore. Every single species on the whole planet is exactly the same.
Every single female of every single species looks at the most competitive males and thinks, those are the ones I wanna have my children. And women, human women, are exactly the same. So if you're not having the success of women that you want,
Don't go out there trying to blame women and don't go out there trying to change women. There are these big movements. They're not going to change. Yeah, they're trying to change women, change the nature of humanity. I'd like to add something to what you're saying there because I tell guys this all the time. You know, they're like, oh, women are shit, women are shit. I truly believe that I get the best version of...
of every woman that I come in contact with.
Yes. And it is a direct result of everything you just said. So you could take woman A and put her with man A and then put her with man B and let's say you are man B. I believe that Tristan or myself will get a better version of that woman A than that man A.
100%.
Ever and a lot of that and fucking all of that has to do with
with who you become as a person and as a man, you can take the same woman and get a completely different woman based off of who you are.
Yeah.
So you see that. No, no, you nailed it. You absolutely nailed it. And I know it. For example, without even getting vulgar, there are things I'll do in the bedroom with women. They'll say, oh, you know, I was with my ex three years. I never let him do that.
I'm like, well, this is our third date, so unlucky for him. Yeah. But he wasn't the best version of the man that she wanted. I obviously fit the archetype of what she wants so much that she's willing to do,
She's willing to do everything for me It's about bringing out the best in people
But friends are the same. I believe that even with friends, even with me and you, I think we bring out the best versions of each other. - Absolutely. - You wake up, you're not training, I'll call your names. We'll go to the gym together. You have to bring out the best version of each other. And if you're a loser,
your woman's going to treat you like a loser, right?
She's not going to respect you.
You were looking for me this morning. This morning, I'm sitting downstairs drinking coffee, and I hear you from the top of the staircase. Justin! And I'm like, I'm up.
Because we had planned to go train this morning. Eight o'clock in the morning. Yep. And you were yelling at us, and all I could do was smile. And I'm like, gotcha, bitch. You know what I'm saying? But, you know, there's something else I want to go to on this. Because a lot of guys will look at you and say, okay, well, he's 6'4".
Handsome as fuck, good beard, rich, his brother's Andrew, but I actually...
have a lot to say about that because there's another version of you
that either lives in Luton
or lives in the States, that's fat as fuck, on the back of a garbage truck or working in some kind of facility. Or skinny as fuck. Yeah. And so,
What do you say about
the guys that think they have no hope and give up because I'm a firm firm firm believer okay maybe you're not Tristan Tate fine maybe you're not six foot three
But for God's sakes, man, you're probably somewhere that's in a good spot. And I would much rather live in Indiana and be the king of my town and have like three or four girlfriends that maybe are seven or eights than completely check out the game completely. And I'd love to hear what you have to say about that as well.
Well,
Like you said, I mean, the six foot four thing, fine. I would have been tall regardless. Right. I would have been six foot four. But if I was a really skinny dude,
who had no money, sat at home playing the Xbox. I have no receipts on social media, no one would know who I was.
You know, I'd probably have a patchy beard because of low testosterone because I've never done any training in my life. That guy's not getting laid.
6'4" or no 6'4". And what people don't want to hear is that to become Tristan Tate,
was a slow process of hard work that took me 15 years. And I'm still working on myself.
I think the Tristan Tate in three or four years is going to be a much better version of who I am now.
And what a lot of people want to do is, you know,
blame
blame their circumstances, but they don't understand that. I mean, height aside, you can change every circumstance about you.
You could change how handsome you are.
You could change how fit you are, how strong you are, how rich you are, how smart you are. I'll talk to women about intellectual things and books I've read.
you know, history. It's like, you know, I love this stuff, but, but why do I know all that? I couldn't afford a university education.
I educate myself. So a lot of the things women like about me, my height aside,
I created for myself and I would much rather have everything else
So you dudes who are out there who are five for eight, why aren't you jacked and smart and rich and driving a fucking Lamborghini and charming and funny? And, you know, why aren't you? But you'll have none of those things. And you'll be like, oh, yeah, Tristan, well, you're 6'4".
As though everything else wasn't my own creation, wasn't my own hard work, because it was.
When it comes to
to
becoming the best version of yourself. And the thought of, let's say you're 5'10", you live in Indiana,
you have less than 250,000 people in your little town. There's got to be three women.
You know what I'm saying? That a Louisiana 9, bro. You know what I'm saying? Which is an inside joke. But look, bro, if it's brown, it's down, which is another inside joke. Any hunter would get that. But the thing is, is like, I don't think that...
that you would if if you were from a town like that and you didn't have some other expectations, you could be more than happy living that life.
Being the man in your town you've maximized everything about you. You don't have to live in Miami per se to really have a good life to really have a rotation of women that you care about Which is something that you're obviously really really good at and the reason I think you're good at that and that's kind of what I'm leading to with this is that Those women stay with you to be completely frank in my opinion because they would have one hell of a fucking time replacing you and
A lot of the time I think so.
But you're forgetting something with your story about what if I lived in this small town? What if, what if? I lived in a tiny ass town. Well, it wasn't tiny, but it was horrible.
And there's very few hot women in Luton, England. And I lived on a council estate and I was flat broke. - Right. - And what did I do? I was at the gym five hours a day. Started winning kickboxing fights. Word around town got out that I was on my way up. Started doing well. I had pretty girlfriends way before. I wasn't a millionaire till I was 28 years old.
I've had pretty girlfriends since I was 17, 18, 19, because I've always been
hardworking and on my way up. And I didn't live in Bucharest or Dubai or, you know, or London. No supercars. Yeah. Or, yeah, or these wonderful cities with all the women. I lived in a horrible little town. But...
There were some beautiful, nice women who lived in that town, and I found them.
- Right. - You know, I found them before Instagram, before Tinder, before dating apps, I found them. So that's that story you're saying, like what if
I literally lived that. Yeah, so did I. I lived that in Louisiana. I lived that in Louisiana. And we were just talking about that earlier. And this is no disrespect to anybody that talks about finish line or anything like that. But we were joking. We said, fuck the finish line. Yeah. Because I've been running over them the whole time. Before I started the race. I was 18. I was working at McDonald's drive-thru. Yeah. And I had some girls who were fire. And I was 18 years old. They were 18, 19, too. I had the best girls of my age in my town.
Yeah. So they weren't waiting at the finish line for me. But like you said, I mean, there is some truth in the statement and the fact that, you know, they backed a good horse. Right. They were certainly they were certainly backing a good horse. Yeah. Yeah. And that's and that's what we came to is like what they might not all be waiting at the finish line because they certainly you don't have to wait until you get to the finish line because I don't think I've had a drought since I started. No, you know, but I do think fitness has a lot to do with that. Of course. And staying big and strong and confident and things like that.
there before maybe the money comes in and maybe before you get to the big city. And so I thought that was a big part of it. I assume that your kickboxing had a huge part of that as well. Well, yeah, I think it's physical presence. When you walk in the room, do people look?
Now I'm wearing a $10,000 suit and a $100,000 watch. But a lot of people don't notice that.
right away.
Most people don't have the taste to notice it. Exactly. So I could walk into any bar in any town in the world.
dressed in modest clothes sweatpants because we do it all the time. Me and you were together. What we've almost been together for another month this time. Yeah.
- Sweats. - It sure is. - Sweats, you know? - And we walk in, and people look, people look. A physical presence is a real thing.
It really is and you can work on that and it's not just you know being tall. It's not only being tall. It's how you carry yourself.
how you're sitting, how you're walking,
how you introduce yourself, how you shake people's hands, how you order your drink at the bar. Yep. Being kind to people is a crazy good sign because if you're secure enough with yourself to be kind to waiters and staff and bartenders, I truly believe it tells people things, especially when they fuck up. Let me tell you a good story about being kind to waiters and bartenders, especially in the city that you live in. It's an investment. It's an investment to throw money around. I do it
Romanian celebrity. I'm not gonna...
name dropper here, but famous girl, a few million followers on Instagram, etc. And the lights had gone out in the garden of one of the fanciest restaurants in town. So obviously, being one of the fanciest restaurants in town, they put a bunch of candles on every table. So I was sitting there as the waiter was pouring our champagne. I said to the girl, I said, "You know what? I specially organized this. I call my friends at the electricity company, had them shut down the power grid just so we could have candles tonight." And she goes, "Hi, hi. All right, Tristan. Yeah. Where's my flowers?"
as a blasé comment, 'cause she knew I was joking. She know I was bullshitting. The waiter, good friend of mine, had been pouring the champagne, overheard this.
No joke, two minutes later, he comes over with the biggest bouquet of flowers he must have taken from behind the rest of it.
Mr. Tate, here are the flowers you ordered. And I sat there, straight face, ice cold.
Sip my champagne.
10 minutes later I was like, you have to excuse me, I get up. I was just like, my man! I was like, no way! Did you just do that? And why? Why? Because I'm rude to waiters? Because I didn't get to know his name? I've been eating at that restaurant for two years before that. I throw money around, I tip well. He knew exactly who I was. So, you know, being kind to people pays dividends. Not only is it, do women notice it?
Because they really do.
But the staff notice it and they treat you better. Being treated with respect around women is a huge turn on for women.
Mr. Tate, how are you? Oh, let me just clear this parking spot. Sorry, we have no tables. Let me just put one out for you.
That's a huge turn on for women. And you get that respect by being kind.
And that's built over time and rapport. Would you say it's a strategy for you to hit certain spots in your town repeatedly enough so you get the opportunity to create that rapport? Yes, but it goes beyond just trying to get women. It really does go beyond that because you're only going to be there for a day or a weekend or a week. But certainly in your hometown and the places you hang out the most, do it.
I love it.
Okay.
I've been waiting for this one.
So I don't know what you're gonna say by the way. This is we're sitting downstairs Tristan. I
You got a suit on? Yeah, alright, we're going upstairs, we're filming a podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? I was almost tricked into this, but it's fine, I'm having a good time.
We'd only be having the same conversation anyway off camera. Yeah, it's true.
We, you know, a lot of our friendship is making fun of each other and saying things that we cannot say on YouTube. Yeah.
So we would get in all fairness. I just got my channel started, so I'm not trying to lose it. Nope. So
- Thank you.
We have me, you.
and Andrew mostly out of our group of friends. You know, the Aussies lean towards
a gentleman by the name of Slim Dusty, but there is some affinity for a man named George Strait. George Strait. In our group. And...
Your viewers would know that. My viewers wouldn't. Yeah, they wouldn't.
But what I want to cover is what I believe is the greatest country music song of all time and We're doing this and yes, we are gonna do it. We're gonna do it because I'll tell you why I'll tell everybody why we're gonna do it because when I met Tristan I
He wasn't really...
he didn't really know who George Strait was. And I I sent him and Andrew a song and I said listen guys this is the best
leaving a woman, what Andrew would call an FDB song of all time. It's called a breakup song. It's a breakup song for, yeah. And
And Tristan listened to it. And after about, I'd say, a few weeks, he said, you know, he's like, I just wish I was a rodeo man. Or I think I would have been a rodeo. I said, Tristan, you are a rodeo man. And so I just want to talk about the progression of how you came to Love & Song, why Andrew walks through the hall singing, and why it is truly the best country music song of all time. Well, you know what? Now I'm thinking about it.
Everything that we've been talking about, leaving women with dignity, not screaming, not shouting, leaving a good impression, leaving something for them to talk about, everything that we've just covered...
is summed up
in the song.
So I don't know how you want to go. You want to go through this? So we'll just go through some of the words. So, um, the song's essentially about a, uh, a rodeo man. He's been on the road, which, um, is the point.
And the message of the song is like every man has his rodeo. Like you had kickboxing. You were all over the place. And you would, you know, you would call. You know what I do. Yeah. And I was chasing steel across America and trying to put buildings up everywhere and trying to build my business. And the first line of the song is, um.
The telephone rang a quarter to nine. She heard his voice on the other end of the line. She wondered what was wrong this time. Yeah, you know, and the second line is. Remember, this is set in 1996. It's 1996. Yeah, yeah. You know, it's cold out here and I'm all alone. I didn't make the short go again. Now I'm coming home.
I know I've been away too long. And long story short, she says, she said, don't bother coming home. By the time you get here, I'll be long gone. There's somebody new. And he sure ain't no rodeo, man. I can't sing. I'm not singing.
And he says and this and this is the line. This is the line. This is a breakup line. So keep in mind. He's he's you know in love with this woman and
He's Mr. He's been at his rodeo. He's just been saying that he's coming home now. - Yeah. - You know, the rodeo didn't go too well. Can't wait to come home.
And she says there's somebody new. Don't bother coming home. His line is,
Well, I'm sorry it's come down to this.
There's so much about you that I'm going to miss.
"But it's okay, baby. "If I hurry, I can still make Cheyenne." - Boom. - Cheyenne is the capital of Wyoming, a famous rodeo town, so he's just off to another rodeo. Two lines and that is it. Who knows how long he's been with this woman?
Five years, six years, a long time. Yeah. Sounds like he loves her.
- Yep, he does.
And, you know,
Andrew and you had a conversation about this song the other day. Yeah, and Andrew made a solid point and I'll just let you kind of re quote what Andrew said about the song. Yeah, well, I thought it was kind of cool how before he
You know, there's going to be so many comments underneath this song now saying Jay Waller sent me here. Yeah, it's going to happen. You're welcome, George. Yeah, he needs our help. He's going to be like, what the fuck? He needs our help. With his 50 number one hits.
But yeah, essentially, I was saying, oh, it's pretty cool how he's telling this woman he loves her, et cetera, but when he hangs up the phone,
You know, when he walks away, it seems he doesn't care. And he's like, no, he cares.
He cares, he loves this woman.
And he really does, because I've been there. Right, so have I. But when you know it's time to say goodbye, and you know you have to walk away, you walk away like a man. Yep. You keep your head held high.
Yep. He leave that phone dangling off the hook. He left that phone dangling off the hook. He slowly turned around and gave it one last look. And what did he do? Walked away. Just walked away.
Beautiful song. Yeah. And you know what? And he went out like a gentleman. Yeah. You know,
But it encapsulates a lot of things about the way I conduct myself, and now I will literally
Literally, instead of saying something like, I don't remember what I used to say before, but it's something along the lines of,
"I'm always gonna remember you. It's a tragedy." That blah, blah, blah, blah. And nice and politely, I'd be cool with it. But now I literally type,
"I'm sorry it's come down to this. There's so much about you that I'm gonna miss." Just so I can screenshot it and send you the screenshot. And he does. And he does. I get three a week from him. Well, I do about three breakups a week, you know. It's a good number. Healthy numbers. I'll get a message from him and it'll be a screenshot of either, it'll be a screenshot of either a girl sending a voice memo to him that I can't hear or she'll be saying something in all caps, let's just say. And he'll say, without an exclamation point, nothing. I'm sorry it's come down to this.
There's so much about you that I'm going to miss. And then he just sends them a pen of Cheyenne, Wyoming. A tag location of Cheyenne, Wyoming. They don't understand that part. They don't get it. But I get it. Now, I will say that girls in my hometown get it. Well, you know what, though? Actually.
Yesterday, I went through a breakup.
You feel bad for me? Yeah. I do. Why? That girl got too drunk and annoyed me when she was in the house with you and Sterling. Yes. Yeah. So, but here's the thing.
I've been hanging out with her for the last little while.
So she's heard me sing the song. Yeah. I've explained the song. Yeah. She knows about the song. Yeah. She's from Ukraine.
And she got those words. So she replied with a laughing face, but she also knew that that was it.
She knew I was serious. And I will never send another message after those words. And that's my news. So ladies out there, if I ever send you this message, I'm sorry it's over.
- Yeah, sorry it's come down to this. - Yeah. I will miss you. - Guys, definitely go check out Still Make Cheyenne. If you listen to it four or five times, you'll really get to see the message behind it. And I do think it is the best way to go out like a gentleman. I also think that if you do care about the woman at all, it's your best shot at her coming back.
- Oh, 100%, 100%, don't burn your bridges. And it's advice I give to young men all the time. Young men are like, especially when,
I mean, your main chick's different. I guess you can, you know, emotion could stir up when it's a girl you really love. But there'll be girls who a guy's just banging.
And she'll be like, oh, well, I found out she has another guy. I'm like,
She's some hoe you're banging, bro. Hoes are collective property almost. I hate when people, and this is a very quick bit of advice for the young men out there. I hate when people say, "Oh, I got my main chick. "I got two side chicks." No, no. - Ah, I think we talked about this. - Yeah, a side chick.
is
as much in love with you and loyal to you as any main chick. She is your girlfriend. She wouldn't look at another man. She's loyal to you. She sends you good night messages every single night and writes you love letters and cooks you meals. That's what a side chick is.
Most people have hoes.
And hoes...
The numbers don't add up if every dude had 25 hoes. Hoes are collective property. Most hoes who you're banging have other guys who they go see sometimes. You don't have side chicks. I've got a nice collection of side chicks. I've got my main chick.
And I've got hoes, but I know who's who. I know who's who, but don't ever waste emotion on a hoe.
Guys,
She upsets you. She's been seeing some other dudes. She's at some party in some club. You just say, you know what?
I'm sorry it's come down to this. There's so many wrinkles that you're going to miss.
No, but you can hit him with, you know what? I didn't know you were that type of girl. You're partying in the club. I don't see this going anywhere goodbye. You don't have to literally use the song lyrics. You could politely say something like that. And that's been my approach for years. Because when you want to wrangle and you want 50 girls at the table, you're going to call all your old hoes. And all my hoes, all my ex-hoes love me.
It's the ex-girlfriends who hate me.
Yeah, because it burns, it burns. But you know what you just said? I didn't plan on going this route, but I do think it's very, very important. And my goal is to be as helpful as I possibly can be. And I know that you are the same way. So to me, the difference between what happiness is, is the gap between expectation and reality.
And so for a young man,
a lot of times I think that he doesn't have the consciousness to see that the girl is a hoe, so he lets his feelings get involved on accidents. It's not so much that he's a pussy, it's that he doesn't know. So can you...
kind of go through the things that you look for within a woman that allow you to identify her as ho
are
chick that you really want to put some kind of effort or care into? Well, what you have to understand is I've got a radar for this. I've been doing this forever. And keep in mind, I've worked in the adult entertainment industry. I know which girls are up to no good and which girls aren't. I can look at a girl's tagged photos or travel locations, who she's standing with. But that's one of them. That's definitely one of them. Talk about that. Look at a girl's Instagram. Let's go through the thought of looking through a girl's Instagram saying, okay, what'd she say her job is? She's a crypto trader. Crypto trader, my fucking ass. She's in eight cities at a time.
I mean, I was at a hotel the other day here in Dubai, and a lovely girl approached me from Romania. And she goes, "Oh, hi, Tristan. I didn't know you were here." I was like, "Oh, hi. Good to see you."
I said, "Well, nice to meet you." I got to speaking with her, and she told me that she was working in real estate, etc. I said, "So where do you live?" She goes, "Oh, I live here at this hotel."
I'm like, you live at the Ritz Carlton, Dubai. She goes, yeah, I live here. Now I know, because I'm sleeping there, that's $2,000 a night.
So I know the cheapest room is $1,000 a night.
So I'm like real estate must be paying well to pay you $365,000 a year rent. It's a hell of a portfolio you have there, young lady. Just say that your sugar daddy pays your rent and you hook on the side. Just tell me. Be straight with me.
Because I haven't got a problem banging you.
I ain't going to pay you any money. I ain't got no problem taking you to bed. But when you talk to me like I'm stupid, that's a red flag. So, yeah, you could tell from a woman's Instagram, from a woman's travel destinations. And this, we do teach all this inside the ballroom. People consult us about this kind of stuff all the time. I'm glad you said that because we're about to do a really big event in Columbia going over all of these different things from identifying a girl, getting your dating apps right, getting your Instagram right, text game, how to text. We're actually going to teach guys live.
how to text and and to pull the wrangle itself live demonstration so if you want to be in columbia it's war room only but uh message justin and uh let's make it happen i'll see you guys there yeah hit me up on uh hit me up on instagram jwaller7 and uh we'll probably i'll i'll i'll kind of screen you a little bit and then get you over to the business account but you know it's going to be one of the best events we've ever done yeah and i think you'd be surprised at what the price
War Room membership. The price is the summit plus the War Room, but I think you'd be surprised at what the value is behind it. So hit me up on Instagram, jwaller7, and of course, follow the talisman on Instagram as well. But anyway, back to the point.
girl and her WhatsApp profile picture was a picture of me and her kissing. I was like, well that's a very good sign because-- - Good sign. - Yeah, there's lots of dudes on, I mean,
The breakups already happened with her, but there's lots of dudes who are trying to WhatsApp her, etc., but it's a picture of me there kissing her in her WhatsApp inbox, and I know she only has one phone. Good sign. But one of the smallest micro details I can tell you is I once took a girl, a girl who's now my main chick, I once took her to a hotel in another country. So it was one of her first trips abroad, and she opens up her suitcase. We're at a five-star hotel, $2,000 a night. I've decided to take her with me. I've known the girl a year, wonderful woman.
I was like, a hair dryer in your suitcase? Now, for you guys listening at home, you'd be like, what does that mean?
Everybody knows that every five-star hotel has a hairdryer attached in the bathroom.
So this girl hasn't been hanging out ever in any luxury five star hotels. She's just the simple girl who she told me she was.
Cause what girl would pack a hairdryer? Everyone knows if every five star hotel has one. She would know, but she didn't know. She didn't know because that was her first time at a five star hotel. That was her first time on a, on a luxury trip at a place like that. And, uh,
It's the micro details that you have to look for, but that comes with experience. You know, a big one that I look for, and I know that you actually look for too, because we've talked about it is, does she or can she travel at will? Because if she has a real job, she can't travel at will. And if she has a real job, that means that somebody is likely not funding her lifestyle. Yes, absolutely. Didn't you meet one of your main girls or maybe a side girl? She works at a mall or something like that.
Yeah, absolutely. She works, and I can't see her as much as I like. She works in a high fashion store. Let's say Cartier. It's a store like that. But I'm not going to say the exact store because people might work out who it is. But yeah, she works at Cartier's store. She works 12, 13 hours a day. I'll be like, I want to see you tonight. No, I can't. No, I can't. I'm at work. Selfie, selfie. I've seen them all. I've seen where she works. That's a very good sign as well.
Girls who are free all the time, they're always available. - Yeah, yeah. - If you're always available and you're always free, you better be dressed in rags and wearing flat ass, cheap, plimsoll style shoes. 'Cause if you turn up in $4,000 shoes, but you're free all the time, I know what you're doing.
So keep your eyes open, young guys. And when you get a girl like this and get her into bed, you've profiled her, you know what she's about.
Enjoy your time with her. Be polite. Be a gentleman. Send her on her way.
Don't fall head over heels with girls like this, because those are the ones, as you said, the naive guys are going to break their hearts on. Yeah, yeah. Guys will get fucked up over that too. And don't be surprised if a girl like that wants to even use you for dinner or whatever. Just make sure your expectation is right, and then your reality won't be far from it, and so you can't get too terribly upset because you kind of know what's coming. I think when you get hit by a punch, you don't see coming as the ones that really hurt. So just a little advice for you guys.
on how to set your expectations in the right way, because you can definitely get wrecked like that. And getting wrecked, man, it fucks your work up, it fucks everything up. It does. And it's a losing battle. You can be...
You can be...
tall, strong, fit, smart.
the best guy in bed who she's ever had, but if some short fat nerd is her payday,
When push comes to shove, she isn't choosing you.
If some dude's paying her 10 grand a month,
to suck his dick every couple weeks. When you say, "Listen, I want you to be "completely loyal to me, come live with me, "it's just me and you." It doesn't matter who you are, you could be Justin Waller. But Justin Waller isn't paying our 10 grand a month, and but, you know.
Mohammed might be.
So, you know, you're going to lose that battle nonetheless. Because these girls who are all about having guys finance their lifestyle, who've fallen into this,
You know, that's all they're about.
So, you know, keep your eyes open. There's nothing you did particularly wrong. You're not, you're not. That's what I was about to say. There's nothing you can do. It's not you. Exactly. It's not you. It's just, you know, and you could be twice the man that he is.
But he's paying.
And you know,
Don't be a customer. It's better to walk away with your dignity.
Right. And look, man, especially for those guys that live out in places that are not the
the Miami, LA, New York City, big, you know, Austin, things like that, man, you have a really good shot at finding a good woman. All this shit on the internet, you know, you see a lot of these podcasts where all you see is these really, really, really,
trash girls
Those trash girls are in very, very
crowded
demographic cities that those type of girls are in. I think the average girl across America and probably Eastern Europe is really good hearted in a way. Now there's still female nature that you have to overcome and you still need to be that guy. But the girl that would pass on a good man for 10 grand, that's just her. And I think those girls are mostly in the bigger cities like Dubai. Yeah, absolutely. And I know I'm the kind of guy that I don't like this doom and gloom,
where all women are garbage, 'cause I know some wonderful women, and I've met some wonderful women in my lifetime. And no, really. - Wonderful woman in my life, bro. - Absolutely. And the thing is, you know,
A lot of the guys who are out there screaming that the fact that good women don't exist, as I said,
They don't exist for them.
And if they don't exist for you, become the guy they exist for. Keep climbing that ladder and you'll find one. I absolutely promise you. They're out there.
And that's wonderful. I tell you what, that's probably a good place to wrap. I do want to go over a little bit of what we're going to be doing in Colombia, man, because I think we can really, really help some guys out there. It's going to be one of the best events.
that we've done, it's going to be
Sartorial.
that you see. There's a very, very strong likelihood that Andrew will be there. Sterling Cooper is going to be doing a master sex class, if anybody likes Sterling Cooper and knows what Sterling does in his day job. It's not bad groceries. Obviously, I'll be there helping with Instagram game. You'll be helping with Instagram game. Setting up frame and the rotation game is something that you're a professional at. Yeah. I mean, it's going to be the kind of stuff,
years some years ago and got outed for that if anybody remembers that it's going to be the most in-depth look into my exact life and my setup and my women and how i run things that anyone's ever going to get right um you know it's going to be real live in person you know you're going to see me texting my main chicks my side girls keeping them happy they're not obviously going to be in colombia but you're going to see me find a bunch more as well and uh see how we manage that situation and uh you know everything i know about how how to attract women and and how to be the man
everybody else and then how to lock them in like it's not it's not just about you know it's not just about
Sleeping with women all the time. It is okay to actually care for a woman, but you do need to know how to operate the situation At said time, you know once you're able to identify it is the right girl I think it's important and one of the things that Sterling and I are gonna cover and if Andrew's there he'll he'll step into it a Lot because that's what we used him for a lot in Miami is is what we call soul locking so we're where a woman just genuinely with all her heart loves you And you know she's loyal
no matter whether you're on a rodeo or not. And there's no feeling like it. There's no trash hoe, no matter how hot you can have sex with and get the same level of satisfaction that when you wake up next to that girl, who maybe she's an 8. Maybe she's not a 10. Or maybe she's a 9. Maybe she's a 7 for you guys out there. Maybe she's a 4.
But that feeling you'll get when she wakes you up in the morning and says, here's your cup of coffee. I know you didn't sleep well last night here. Have a great day. Have a productive day at work. I love you. I miss you. That is so much...
Better, a life without that would be an empty, vacuous existence, and I wouldn't want to live it.
Absolutely. Man, I appreciate you, bro. I feel like we cleared up a lot of things that some guys wanted to hear. You're you're getting to see
not only the truth about how things are done, but
top level
how it's done, how everybody's happy, how we have a great life. And honestly, we all have a great family life together or with your main girl, whatever it is and how it all mixes together, man. I couldn't be happier. I'm happy, just as happy off this camera, off the Instagram, on the couch with you downstairs. Like we're about to go watch war, war documentaries. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then, then anything else in this world, man. And I think having a good woman in your life is a huge part of that. So understanding how to operate and, and set the whole thing up,
everything and do it smoothly, do it like a gentleman, something that you can be proud of, is something really important. And I think we got a lot of those things out in the open tonight, man. So let's go watch war movies. Thank you for watching. All right, guys, later.