Transcript
Right, the lightning is not great for this video, but I have
a
confession to make
So I'm gonna make it.
Thank you.
I have a disease.
and my disease has led me to steal
this Orbit watermelon chewing gum.
despite the fact I have enough money to easily pay for it,
I suffer from a disease that makes me steal things.
See, I always thought that if you make shit choices in your life...
that it's down to you and you should have some personal responsibility. But I recently found out that addiction is a disease.
in light of all the modern bullshit that's going on with all these spoiled cump celebrities,
I had someone explain to me that addiction is a disease. And I said, well, addiction is not a disease because there's a choice you make at the beginning.
I don't know a disease on earth where you make a choice
At the start,
which begins the series of events.
If you have an addiction,
you make a choice
to get up, get dressed, go.
meet the person who has whatever substance, purchase it, go home,
and inject it. There's a whole bunch of choices
before the actual act itself. And they said, "No, addiction's a disease "because it's been shown in their brain "that when they withdraw." I'm like, "Yeah, I'm sure in your brain, "you can see brain chemicals, you know, obviously, "certain things you enjoy and
If you miss something, you can measure it. I understand all of what you're trying to say. I still do not see how addiction is a disease because there's a choice in the beginning.
But they corrected me.
They said no.
Addiction is a disease.
even though there's a choice at the start.
because it's very difficult to quit,
And if they don't do the whatever activity they're doing, whether it's gambling, whether it's taking drugs, whether it's alcohol, whatever, whatever, you can notice in the brain serotonin levels drop, etc., etc.,
I said, "Okay, well,
You know what I like?
Free shit.
I like free stuff.
So even though I make the choice to steal,
I have a disease because if I don't steal,
It's very difficult for me not to because you can measure in my brain that I'm pissed off. I haven't got free things.
So I started small with my Orbit chewing gum.
But I actually intend on getting
Big time. Banks, cars, I don't even know. Whatever. I can take whatever I want now. I have a disease. Stealing is officially a disease.
If having addiction is a disease,
and the choice at the start of it
completely has nothing to do with your own personal responsibility, and you have absolutely zero part to play because you're ill,
Well then I'm ill. I'm ill too.
and stealing is my affliction.
So I want you all to feel sorry for me.
So when I go to court,
I want all of you to be protesting outside that the judges don't understand that I have a disease. It's not my fault I steal.
It's not my fault that I get up, get dressed, go to the place where I'm stealing from, consciously try and hide my action, steal whatever I steal and leave because I have a disease.
And I want the entire justice system to reflect that. Like, just like with the junkie.
Everyone feels sorry for them, they get counseling, millions and millions of dollars are spent trying to rehabilitate these diseased people. That's what I deserve for my stealing.
I want exactly the same thing. In fact, if you're a murderer,
It's not your fault. It's a disease. Yeah, you made a choice to chop that person's head off, but if you didn't do it, you might have been unhappy because they really annoyed you. And the only way you could think of to satisfy your urge was to fuck them up. So you went and did it. And even though you made a choice at the beginning, it's not your fault. Addiction is a disease. Stealing is a disease. Anything bad anyone does on earth is a disease. None of us are responsible for anything we do. There's zero personal responsibility involved in any of it. We're just feathers in the wind,
catch some terrible affliction that allows us to steal, not allows, compels us to steal.
Orbit Watermelon Choo-Yah.