Transcript
Unfortunately, I do not have the old tweet, as I've lived many different incarnations upon the planet, especially on social media platforms. But a few years ago, I made a tweet in which I was particularly abrasive and insulting towards the new fashion trend, which were those infantile, oversized, hidden, height-increasing shoes. Those large shoes with a huge sole.
as any red-blooded male should have been. And I wasn't sure exactly what it was. I don't know if it was the idea that short men were trying to act large, and as a man of naturally large stature, I was insulted that inferior specimens of the human race were trying to pretend they were my equal. I wasn't sure if it was just for the fact that the shoes looked infantile and childish. I think it was every single time I went shopping, I could no longer buy a nice pair of trainers or sneakers from any of the reputable brands, because they'd all been oversized Lego brick garbage.
realized that actually the reason I was so overtly offended is because I am all seeing, all knowing tape. I am an Oracle. I am basically a psychic. In fact, I'm basically the most smartest, knowledgeable person on the planet. I have never predicted anything wrong in history. Every single call I've ever made has turned out to be completely accurate and factually correct. And the reason I was so instantly enraged when I saw these stupid fucking shoes on people's feet is because I did
as an Aikido master, I knew that later on, this glaring fact would be presented to me. Who invented that trend? Which was the first brand that came out with those stupid oversized shoes? Balenciaga. The pedophiles. They're pedophile shoes. Now it all makes sense. When I first saw them, I was so pissed off and I was pissed off at any man I saw wearing them. I didn't really know why, but now I know why because they were invented by fucking pedophiles. So just like we will all
and criticize any single person you see walking to a Balenciaga store, I would actually like to expand that out across the entire fashion trend of these stupid overlarge shoes that people are wearing. These men walking around with these massive fucking shoes on. It's immature and it's pathetic. It was invented by pedophiles. It means by wearing them, you support pedophilia. You're basically a fucking pedophile yourself. They are now pedophile shoes. Whenever I see a man wearing them, I will tell him that brand, the brand that started that fashion trend,
was invented by pedophiles. Do you support pedophilia? I'm watching them go, no, no. Well, then you better fucking take them off. The sooner I can end this stupid brand, this stupid fucking fashion trend, the sooner I can go into a shopping mall and go shopping again, because I haven't bought a pair of shoes in years, because they're all fucking trash. The whole trend is garbage. It was invented by pedophiles, down with Balenciaga, and by extension, down with all that big shoe bullshit. Sorry, short guys. God doesn't like you very much. You're genetically inferior. Back down there where you belong.
No more clunky shoes.
Yeah.