Transcript
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♪ ♪ ♪ Mr. Producer ♪ ♪ Oh ♪ ♪ You make the best shows ♪ ♪ Mr. Producer ♪ ♪ You got all them moves ♪ ♪ Mr. Producer ♪ ♪ Oh ♪ ♪ Gonna break the feeling ♪ ♪ Mr. Producer ♪ ♪ Through the emergency meeting ♪
♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
*Outro Music*
Now?
Hello?
Hello.
It's me.
Okay, we're working.
Amen.
All right, listen up, niggers.
We have a fucking emergency.
I've had to come back here and do another emergency meeting because it's a genuine emergency.
I want you to understand.
It was four in the morning when this fucking waste of time debate began.
It's a waste of fucking time. Everybody knows it's a waste of time.
You're not changing anybody's minds. The teams have been set. There's not a single fucking faggot
who's sitting there watching this debate who goes i was gonna vote for kamala
But after listening to Trump, I've changed my mind. Not a single fucking one.
The gays and the chicks.
are voting for Kamala and the dudes are voting for Trump. And it's actually very disappointing to watch.
Because you want Trump to just come out savage.
You know, Trump was savage in 2016.
But...
The problem is...
The internet and the world has got more savage since then.
You know, we're on the verge of World War III.
Amen.
We're going to die. We need some real savagery.
Thank you.
Like racism used to be a thing. Now racism's just like, duh.
We need more savagery. Trump used to say fake news and we're like, whoa, savage.
We all know it's fake.
That's not savage anymore for Trump to be savage. He has to say, shut up, bimbo.
Get back to your blowjobs.
And he can't do that. So you're watching the debate.
You're kind of like, come on, Trump, fucking...
Teach her a fucking lesson.
But he can't be as savage as we expect out here in the wild west. We no longer live in the zoo. We live in the jungle.
We're not domesticated anymore. We're out in the jungle with the wild animals.
You go on Twitter.
You say hello, someone calls you a fucking nigger. Someone wishes you're dead.
It's great.
It's a fun life.
And now it's like fake news. Yeah.
So these debates are so fucking pointless They're so dumb As a man who's just waiting for Trump to wreck her and he can't
And she is just doing anything.
She just looks at him.
You scroll Twitter now, there's someone going, ha, when she makes that face, you know she's gonna serve.
That's how she won the debate.
there are people who you live amongst who believe she deserves to be your president
having control of the most powerful military on earth, having control of nuclear weapons. There are people who you live amongst.
who think that she deserves to rule your life because she did this.
Thank you.
These are your countrymen.
Probably country women. Women vote for this shit.
So it's all fucked and the politics are a waste of time, but I thought, you let me stay up till four in the morning. Let me watch it with my friends.
You know?
I always have around 30, 40,000 friends who come to join and watch. Let me watch it with my friends.
So I stayed up till four in the fucking morning.
And watch that.
debate
Debate ended. It was 6 o'clock. I'm tired.
So fuck, I'll go to bed. I haven't slept in over 24 hours.
So we get into bed.
And then I hear that fucking Taylor fucking Swift.
Amen.
It's supporting Kamala.
Fuck!
What chance do we now stand?
Fuck's sake!
I really thought Taylor Swift would have watched the debate and came to her own logical conclusions.
Upon.
It's completion.
based on the competence, track record, and policy of both candidates.
I believed in Taylor Swift to do the right thing.
Now, I'm sure this wasn't preplanned.
There's no way they planned in advance for the fucking debate to finish and then Taylor Swift to announce her support and turn off her Instagram comments so no one can call her a fucking bimbo.
I'm sure she watched the debate.
Travis was sucking her off. She doesn't suck him off. He sucks her off. He's sucking her off.
When does my contract end Taylor? When does my contract end? Shut up, bitch
Fuck it
Who the fuck was he before Taylor Swift anyway, yeah, I know why he took that contract I don't know who the fuck this motherfucker NFL
Gay as hell.
Thank you.
So she must have watched the debate
and of course because none of this is scripted and planned came to her own super logical conclusion
And been like, wow, Kamala, you nailed it. You nailed it with that.
Fuck the patriarchy! Breath.
Thank you.
So how am I supposed to sleep? It's a fucking emergency. Now it's fucking nine o'clock in the morning.
Up and up 26 hours.
All the coffees I had earlier to keep me up at 4 a.m. are now fucking ice cold.
Thank you.
All the females in my house are asleep.
So I can't get a new coffee probably on their fucking periods after they've just voted for Kamala.
All the fucking treacherous heathens in my house. I probably already cast our fucking vote in their sleep.
After Taylor Swift put out her Instagram post.
Somehow they psychically start to send mail-in ballots to fucking Georgia that will get dumped into a voting bin at 4am during a counting pause.
Andrews bitch one Andrews bitch two Andrews bitch three Oh camel actually won this county because 55,000 of Andrews bitches
putting mail-in votes after Taylor Swift put out her Instagram.
Fucking Travis is still sucking her off.
Now I have to drink my cold coffee.
Thank you.
It's a fucking travesty
How are we going to survive this?
Thank you.
Thank you.
Fuck.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Guys, I know exactly what we're gonna do, okay? Here's what we're gonna do, guys. Kamala's gonna do the debate, and then we're gonna get Taylor Swift to do an Instagram post saying that...
Thank you.
I just imagine being in that team meeting.
Imagine me sitting there.
Taylor Swift's Christmas present!
Shut the fuck up faggot shut the fuck up
You're a faggot.
You know who I need in that meeting? Simon.
My G.
I'll go do that meeting with fucking Simon.
Why are you gay?
Cigar for breakfast.
Thank you.
*slaps*
Thank you.
So now what are we going to do, guys?
Fuckin Taylor Swift
Okay.
Unbelievable.
I wonder if they set up a whole host of fucking liberal matrix controlled NGO MK ultra minded fucking entertainment slaves to jerk off to Kamala weekly up until the election a whole fucking schedule Taylor Swift comes out this day
Oprah comes out next day. Fucking...
Thank you.
Who's next?
I don't fucking know. I don't even know these people. I don't know these people.
And I have to be careful when I say people's names, because I'm famous enough to accidentally one day meet them.
You know, I'll be standing somewhere and I'll go up and they'll go, Oh, here's Ben Affleck. And I'll be like, Oh, hi Ben.
You said on a stream that I fuck old ladies.
Jennifer is old, bro.
Gears of a young bitch are famous. What the fuck you fuck around with a 60-year-old for?
Do the Camelot face at me.
I'm just, what do you want me to do?
Bye.
I'm just a guy.
I'm just a guy.
With cold coffee.
furious and and scared so who's next which celebrity's next who's gonna come out next and have this revelation they haven't pre-planned it it's not scheduled they're gonna have this revelation off the top of their head bam
Kamala for president!
Do you have an idea how big of a faggot you have to be to want a woman to be your president?
All these men on Twitter. I'm a real man. I'm a Marine and I drive a truck and I'm voting for Kamala.
Gen Aids test!
Cause you're gay.
Listen, I'm eating Hello Kitty cereal from the fucking box and I'm less gay than you.
Thank you.
Many people often ask me about my fantastic physique. They say, "Andrew,
You have so many muscles.
You're so strong and big. How do you do that? You're looking at it. I smoke. I eat Hello Kitty cereal in a state of Taylor Swift-induced distress.
I drink lots of coffee.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Man who's off a man?
*snort*
Has been around enough erratic women to know that you don't want them to be your fucking president
I'm gonna do a simple drop, bro
Thank you.
You just ask them to do anything and say, "Quick! Quickly though, quickly!"
And they'll panic.
Something simple.
"What? What? What?"
Thank you.
Um...
I want a chicken charge. Yeah!
We're the new type of man, yeah! Girls for president!
*clap*
The kind of dude who would suck off Taylor Swift.
You know, I believe
in the cosmic justice of the universe I believe that some civilizations deserve to be destroyed listen
I'm a brown man.
Okay, you can't call me a white supremacist. You can't call me a racist. I'm a brown guy.
But when they turn up with gunpowder,
And we've spent all our time fucking so we've invented slingshots
It's kind of like, well...
We lost. You know?
We didn't have what it took at the time.
So when I see these American men going, "Gamala!" I'm like, "You know what? Maybe America deserves to fall now."
Has it reached that point where it just deserves it?
Aren't we there now?
Maybe we're there.
Maybe it all deserves to fucking burn.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You're trying to save these people from themselves. You're an idiot. We don't want Kamala. We want Trump. Don't worry. We're going to vote Trump in. Oh my God. You're a fucking Nazi. Oh my God.
Why am I a Nazi? Oh my God.
You don't instantly agree with my point of view, which I'm not going to substantiate. Are you serious right now?
Thank you.
Okay.
This is what I mean. We're no longer in 2016. We're in 2024.
Back then,
a conservative,
could teach a liberal a lesson.
By saying like, hey.
Men can't have babies and they'd say oh my god, and he'd say I said what I said and we'd be like whoa
What a badass!
boring
Sorry, Turning Point.
Sorry, Ben Shapiro.
who had a meltdown on BBC. I destroyed BBC every time I debated them. Ben Shapiro, look at his famous meltdown. Got his ass whooped. That's how I know I won't wreck him.
Plus he's 5'3".
Little bitch. Shorter than the girl I fuck.
Anyway, that's not cool anymore.
You can't just say to a liberal, yeah, men can't get pregnant.
Oh.
Now you gotta say, hey, men can't get pregnant. Oh my God, shut up, bitch. You heard what I fucking said.
The fu-
You gotta up the game.
You know, I'm bored of the dumb shit. I'm bored of all these fucking...
Republicans.
Taking the high ground.
I won't call them names and crime on llama smart guy, you know, I'll call you all fucking names Next time I talk to the BBC. I'm gonna call them faggots. Are you human trafficker? Yeah faggot. I
*laughs*
Next question.
I'm gonna eat Hello Kitty cereal in the middle of a BBC interview
Thank you.
Thank you.
*slurping*
I don't eat pussy. I do eat this the key to health.
Nice ice cold coffee and some fucking nicotine
Thank you.
*Sigh*
Thank you.
So we need to up the game.
You need the game back.
Taylor Swift turned off her comments because she knew she was gonna get roasted I would like to see the comments
*Sigh*
But she wouldn't be roasted like we want to, you know? No one's just gonna say, "Your eggs are gone, fuck off!"
Let me.
I don't even dislike Taylor Swift. At some point in the future, I'm going to meet her.
I'm gonna be like, hi, Taylor. Yeah, I did a stream on you. Because you supported some fucking idiot.
It's not personal, but you're part of the matrix.
And they're using you as a tool to try and enslave us all. So sorry.
Don't get upset.
And then her 98th boyfriend standing next to her probably like, Hey bro, that's my queen.
So gay.
Amen.
That's my girl!
You're a fucking faggot.
Taylor Swift lyrics Let's see
What kind of genius?
She's obviously a genius because she's so famous and she's so rich. I'm not going to, I can't call her unsuccessful. She's not amazing.
We'll see what kind of genius is telling us who should lead our country.
where I don't know Taylor Swift songs.
I guess I have to choose a song for Taylor Swift lyrics. Ah, no, I don't. There is a medium article
by Brandon Loudon.
He's straight.
on his favorite Taylor Swift lyrics. All right.
Brandon Loudon, I'm sure you're not a homo.
What we got?
Bye -bye.
Bye-bye.
Right. A place in this world must be a song.
I don't know what I want.
So don't ask me.
Thank you.
Well, we didn't fucking ask you. We didn't ask you who you wanted to be president.
And you told us anyway.
So that didn't fucking work.
I've never asked her a question ever.
Thank you.
fact-checked me hello ABC fact-check has top G ever gone up to Taylor Swift and said hi
Please answer the following: Give a fuck? You don't care what color underwear you have on?
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Stay beautiful.
He smiles it's like the radio
The radios smile the radios even have graphical representation or a radios just noise Is this smile loud?
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay.
Thank you.
Oh, this is upsetting me.
I heart question mark. I've never I've never heard these songs. I don't know these songs.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Wake up and smell the breakup.
Realize we won't make up.
I'm not going to lie, that one rhymed.
It was good.
Oh, these are her old ones from 2006. This article is long as fuck. How many? Don't wonder she's famous. She has a trillion songs.
She has a fucking trillion songs.
Lover to 19, 20, 19. I'm halfway through this article. This is ridiculous. Who the fuck is this homo again?
He's trying to make me sign up to Medium.
All right, 2023.
Now that we don't talk.
is a song. I don't have to pretend I like acid rock. Okay. This is, this is unbearable.
Who's this person again? Guys, please look up.
Brandon Michael Loden.
Because he's not wasting his life at all.
Thank you.
This is a pinnacle of masculine performance.
He must have spent a month...
Writing the longest Taylor Swift article in the world, but he did manage to end up getting featured on an emergency meeting. So I guess he has achieved something. Congratulations, sir. I'll bet he's voting for Kamala.
I wonder if there's anyone who likes Taylor Swift, who wasn't already voting for Kamala.
Isn't this just like a bullshit? Foregone conclusion. Don't you feel like this whole election is just highlighting?
everything I've been saying for years.
You know when I first came on the scene and everyone's calling me crazy Let's talk about the matrix and like the matrix the matrix. Huh? The matrix, right?
Here we are three years later. They lied to you about COVID. They lied to you about everything. Kamala's on there. ABC news is on her side.
Taylor Swift and all the establishment figures, everyone who has a record contract or athletes contract or YouTube channel supports her. Have I ever told you all from the beginning that there's a matrix and that you have to sell your soul to be part of it? Do you think Taylor Swift was allowed to say no?
Maybe this is unfair, me making fun of her. Maybe she's a hostage and all this shit. Maybe she never even had a fucking choice.
Okay.
Maybe they came to her, the men in the black suits, and said...
Thank you.
They probably have strangely intimidating Swiss accents, which I can't do a Swiss accent.
But imagine it.
You know?
Like Taylor.
You want to make it to the next tour.
Don't you?
And she's like, I hate that bitch. I hate that bitch.
Taylor.
But she's black!
Thank you.
Maybe she had no choice. Maybe she had no choice.
Thank you.
What I want to know
is when I can pull my fucking race card.
I've been attacked by the matrix. I've been cancelled on every single type of payment processing I'm currently banned from YouTube Facebook Instagram Gmail whatsapp Skype Airbnb motherfucking be Discord every bank account you can name I'm banned from everything they threw me in fucking jail the American Embassy Didn't help me at all the BBC constantly attacked me all day every day. When do I get to say guys stop? I'm black
why leave me alone this other NFL guy just got stopped by cops
for speeding.
Then was belligerent, put his window up and told him to fuck off.
got quite rightly dragged out of his car and he's now crying about the race car and
I haven't even fucking done anything.
Fuck a few bitches 10 years ago. Now they keep attacking me.
Hello, I'm from the BBC and I need a comment. 13 years ago, you abused a girl. I want your comment.
Okay, who did I abuse? I can't tell you.
Okay, where did I abuse her? I can't tell you.
Okay, what comment can I possibly give you?
13 years ago someone we don't know who you don't remember who if they exist at all in an undisclosed location at unknown time was abused by you what do you say
How the fuck do you even answer that question? I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
Rapist! Rapist!
Guys, I'm black.
Hello?
I've been through the ringer.
I have my mother and father met on chick sands army base.
In the UK.
My father worked for the Air Force at the time.
He was black, she was white in the 80s. There was a lot of stigma.
for a mixed race couple. My father got stationed in West Berlin. We were there when the Berlin Wall fell.
Because we got a piece of the wall. We got a brick of the wall in the house. I remember when I was three.
And we couldn't find an apartment in West Berlin because the Germans wouldn't rent an apartment out.
to an interracial couple.
I remember all this.
I have suffered.
I want reparations and still the MSM attacks me endlessly. I'm deleted from everything.
Like guys, I bought 60 sports cars. I wear a diamond watch. I've got eight baby mamas. What more do you want me to do? I've proved I'm black. I've been to jail. I've got my black card.
When does it fucking help me out? Help a nigger out.
All you do is fucking pick on me.
Thank you.
They treat me like I'm a fucking white guy.
White boys ain't built like me on Hello Kitty cereal. If a white boy even sniffed this box, he'd be skinny fat for the rest of his fucking life.
Thank you.
Only a black man can eat this shit and beat the fuck out people
Where the fuck is my black card?
That's what I want to know.
When Taylor Swift sees this and gets pissed off, I can say, ah, Taylor.
You insulted me and you don't even know me.
Don't be racist, Taylor.
Thank you.
Are you saying that because I'm black?
Thank you.
Maybe I need to grow dreadlocks. Maybe that'll fix all my legal problems. Maybe the American embassy will bust into the Romanian jail with seal team six. Arm to the teeth with AR-15s.
Because I've grown dreadlocks.
Bye.
Operation Save-A-Nig.
Because so far, my black card has not helped me.
At all.
So yeah, Taylor Swift's going to swing the election. All the Swifties are going to vote.
The 10-year-olds.
*whispers*
Let me try and think of a scenario.
where I would end up
in a Taylor Swift concert.
Let's run this mathematically.
Would I ever buy a ticket? No. Do I want to go? No. Would I allow my woman I'm dating to go? No.
Even without me. No Would any woman I'm dating want to go? No Will my children my daughters ever go to this shit? No, cuz I'm the boss. I want to go see Taylor Swift. I
You're not allowed. Why? Cause she said, fuck the patriarchy. And I'm the patriarchy and I'm paying for the ticket. So no.
So none of that's going to happen. Maybe my private jet will crash.
It'll be on its way down the fireball and the fire is encroaching in on the cabin and I'm doing aikido To generate enough pan speed and wind to push the fireball back and then it crashes into the ground and I crawl out
Ugh.
And I'll be like, that was the worst thing that ever happened to me.
And then I'll look around and be instantly trumped. The event will be instantly replaced and surpassed. Fuck.
I thought the plane crash was the worst thing that ever happened to me, but now I'm in a Taylor Swift concert.
And everyone's singing her songs.
And I'm standing there covered in bruises and blood.
Enraged.
Amen.
Amen.
It's possible.
And then...
Obviously I'll go right to the front
Because who's in the way?
Little girls and their little boyfriends.
I'll be like, move.
Fuck off, move.
Eventually I'll push a girl.
And her boyfriend will say, hey, buddy.
He'll be white.
He'd be a white boy. He'd be a little cracker.
Hey, Buster.
Thank you.
What?
Gee whiz, gee golly whiz, you can't push my girl like that.
Thank you.
*DANG!* Snap his neck.
One fatality to die in the crowd.
keep walking to the front fuck off get right to the front and say Taylor
Taylor.
Thank you.
All the music stops.
Taylor.
Thank you.
Did you do that Instagram post on your own or did they make you?
Thank you.
Maybe then she'll admit it.
on the mic in front of everyone.
"Top G, my hero! Finally someone! They made me do it! I didn't want to endorse her because she's stupid and she's black!" I'll be like, "It's fine! I'm here now!"
To save you.
I'll get on stage and stand next to her and say, listen, I know your songs are shit. I know they force you to do this, but as a damsel in distress, I'm here to save you. And then the democratic agents will come out.
50,000 clones of Harry Sisson will appear and start trying to rush to kill her and me. I'll be getting my Ikea. It'll be like a Matrix movie. You'll see Harry Sisson dying in a pile left and right. The agent will grab her and be like, come bitch.
Drop the guitar!
grab her
Thank you.
moving through the crowd.
some little kid in the way,
Yeah.
*laughter*
Get her out of there. Save her from herself.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You know what's funny? It's funny because I'm rich enough. Guys, I am rich enough
And once I bust this stupid case and I'm free again, I am rich enough to hire an actress, hire a movie crew and make this movie. If you think I won't make the movie.
Of evil Kamala Harris's team forcing Taylor Swift to endorse her on Instagram and me crashing my private jet and annihilating all of her fans to get to the front, beating up a bunch of hairy Sissons and rescuing her from her enslavement.
And at the end, I'm finally rewarded by God with my black card that I've never been able to play for any of the attacks they've ever used against me. If you guys think
I won't make this movie. I will. It'll be a fucking blockbuster.
I know you all watch it.
I know you'll watch it. When you see me flying elbow that kid who's in the way.
I'm trying to get through the crowd. There's a kid. And our head explodes.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Can't wait for Kamala to be president.
Can't wait.
You know what the world really needs
It needs more girl boss energy. Don't you feel like we don't have enough of that shit? I
Thank you.
don't you feel like we don't have enough girl boss energy
I'll tell you a story the other day.
Anyone who follows me saw that I made a video promoting daddy coin with girls on ATVs.
Please go watch the video. It was me and my brother on ATVs running from girls on ATVs. Before we filmed it, I said to all the girls, girls, can you drive ATVs? Yeah, we could drive ATVs. I said, girls can't drive. Are you sure? Yeah, we can. Within five minutes, two crashed, one hospitalization, complete fucking shit show.
I knew I was right from the beginning. I knew it.
I got home from this event.
And I decided to vent.
You know?
I thought, fuck it. I'm mad. They've ruined my film shoot.
So I go up to the nearest hot bitch in my house. They're just like,
It's like ashtrays. They're just around.
Oh my bitch.
Guess what happened today?
I told these bitches they couldn't drive they told me they could drive we organized this whole film shoot we had fucking drones and cameras and they crashed one of them broke her legs stupid bitch ruined everything
You know what she said to me?
You should have brought me. I'm great on an ATV.
I've just been here. I've just heard women say that then crash. I I don't want to hear it again You're rubbing salt in the wound. Why are you great on an ATV? I
Oh, I did it before. When? Oh, in Mexico.
what wants.
Yeah. Oh, once at Mexico at four miles an hour, you followed a guide once for five minutes and now you're great.
Are you great? Are you a fucking expert?
Are you?
The female arrogance, a man won't admit he's great at something without a life of dedication and practice. A man will say, are you great? Well, I've been training for 10 years. I'm not bad.
but a woman oh she's done it once for four minutes oh she's fucking great
The arrogance is astronomical.
Don't you think the world needs more of this girl boss?
Maybe I'm old fashioned for thinking there's way too much. Maybe we need loads more.
You know?
Kamala why did you go nuclear war with Russia?
*sniffles*
*laughs*
My family are dead, Kamala. My family.
I'm speaking.
Yeah.
It's all so fucked. Some dude in the corner jerking off. Great job, Kamala!
*Sigh*
Thank you.
Every time I talk, I'm acutely aware of the fact that everything I've ever said ends up in a court file. I'm gonna have to go through this entire,
Fucking spiel in court again. They're gonna read it out and they're gonna ask me for comment and I you know worst thing is it's gonna be about a year from now I would have forgotten what I said but the thing is about me is I find myself super funny so when they read this shit out I'll be sitting there like.
Thank you.
I'm funny.
Okay.
And they don't seem to like when I laugh at my own jokes.
Like, ah, eight years ago on YouTube, you said this.
And they read it out in court. And I'm just like...
It's pretty fucking funny.
Pretty based.
what do you have to say i have to say it was it's funny
Amen.
Have to say lol
Write that down in your little fucking notepad. LOL.
So basically, I think Taylor Swift was forced to do this. She had no choice but...
No chance. I need to save her. And there's gonna be a whole bunch of other celebrities unless they want to be exposed.
covered in Balenciaga and children's blood.
fucking goats or whatever they do.
They're all going to have to support Kamala. So once a week, someone's going to come out with some high profile support and their comments turned off.
Once a week.
is going to happen all the way up to the president bullshit. Then they're going to rig it.
Then it's over.
Amen.
Trump has to win by a ridiculous margin. He can't win by 3%, 4%. They'll rig that. They're going to rig in 5, 6, 7, 8%. You go, he's got wind by 15, 20%. He's got to landslide it. We're going to stand a chance.
Thank you.
*Sigh*
That's the game we're now playing.
Thank you.
Let me scroll Twitter and see if there's anything good on Twitter.
Anything racist and funny, you know?
*whistling*
Okay.
Elon supports Trump that's good cute little R that's nice
Ryan, he's based.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
This shows the inner workings of my mind, my Twitter feed. It's just random animals because I like animals.
and political
Okay.
Political bullshit that doesn't even matter.
None of this shit's real.
It's all fucking, it's all made up and fake and gay.
"Aw, Aiden, what's he doing with his life?"
The same shit is always done
Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, debate, debate, debate. It's all boring.
You know what? I think I could have done better in that debate. Although Trump did good, I could have done better.
Okay.
Nice.
boring there needs to be like why is no one said okay
I say the election is rigged. You say it isn't.
But this shouldn't even be a conversation. We should have a voting system that's so secure that there can't be any discussions of a possible rigging.
Because we are the bedrock of democracy, so let's fix it.
Don't you agree that we should make sure that the votes are cast in a way where nobody can doubt?
at all.
the result of the election. Wouldn't you agree that's important for electoral security and integrity?
Pretty hard to go against.
Well, no. Oh, so you want it to be rigged? No, I don't want to be rigged, but I don't think we should get IDs. I didn't say IDs.
I'm saying we need a system that everyone can subscribe to that will ensure no fraud. Do you agree?
Simple question.
I know what she'd reply.
I grew up in a middle-class household.
No one cares.
So yeah guys, I thought I'd just let you know that I'm very distressed about this Taylor Swift situation. I'm very upset.
extremely concerned
I don't know what I'm going to do.
Thank you.
I don't know what I'm going to do.
I might stay up having not slept all night, go train while eating Hello Kitty cereal, smoke a whole bunch of cigars.
buy more diamond watches like a silly fucking black.
and sit in my house.
That's what I might do.
That might be my solution to the problem. I can't think of what else to do besides spend my money on things I don't use or see or touch.
Because I have so much fish fucking everywhere.
buying Diamond Watch in Singapore. Is everyone going to fucking fly there to get it? I'm fucking arrested.
just sits there in the jeweler.
And I'm getting a message from him in fucking Chinese.
Oh Ching Chang when you want to collect watching Ching Ching Ching
My bro, I don't want to collect it. I just bought it.
I'm black.
Okay.
I know you're not familiar with my kind over there really yet in Singapore.
Thank you.
But basically I just look at shiny things and I buy them because I have money.
And I don't think of the future.
I never considered flying there and getting it.
I just thought, wow, shiny. Nigger blood says yes.
And because I have a white side, the white side of me managed to use Google Translate and send you a fucking Chinese message. And here we are.
A $400,000 watch I don't even fucking, I've never seen or touched.
That's my life now. Taylor Swift has endorsed Kamala. I'm going to be up all day with no sleep, zero sleep, drinking coffee, smoking cigars, buying shit.
I'll be inside the real world talking to my students. I'll be getting a bunch of important phone calls from lawyers and people. I'll be like, hi.
Yeah, yeah.
It's fine.
*clap*
Court this day, court that day, blah, blah.
*clap*
Thank you.
Thank you.
I have this strange theory.
before I go,
Thank you.
My theory.
Now.
is that
Trump is a disruptor.
Yes, that is true.
But after Trump,
Thank you.
When his four years are gone,
I feel like
It's gonna be a race
between the two parties for who can lose the presidential election.
because I feel like the matrix in the military industrial complex is
will have such a deep control over American policy, both domestic and foreign.
that no president will be allowed to go against them and no
Parry is going to want the heat.
from the decisions they make.
The matrix is going to run America and they're going to do whatever the fuck they want. And the average person's life is going to get wrecked. So they don't want their party in charge because then they're liable. They want the other party in charge so they can say, look what they're doing. We wouldn't do that. But then hopefully never win an election. And all these senators can just keep their jobs as Democrats or Republicans. It doesn't matter. They keep their jobs. Who cares? And their president is just one person.
So whoever goes up to the front, the effigy gets burnt.
actually damages the whole party because the MIC is going to just run everything into the ground anyway.
So I feel like it's going to be a race to the bottom. Now that is a debate I want to see.
Imagine the presidential debate where both candidates are trying to ensure they lose.
Finally, we'll get some funny racist jokes.
Finally, we'll get some homophobia and all the things we'll get some funny things.
Finally the way up there saying based shit
Finally, you'll see someone walk up there and go, no trannies.
Then finally, the debates will be interesting.
They'll probably wheel me out.
This vice VP.
The most hated man in the world. My black card probably still won't work by then.
I am a minority and I'm being picked on by the MSM.
I'm sick of this.
I must be the most picked on black man ever. Name another black person who's been scrutinized by the media as much as me. Genuine question. Name someone who is not white, who has been scrutinized by the media as much as I have.
Go.
It's like Jeopardy.
Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo.
Doo doo doo doo doo.
No, I'm not nigger.
I'm that guy. The most picked on black man ever.
I hold the record for the most picked on black man in history.
if only I had taken a bunch of fentanyl and used an illegal banknote I could have been a hero but instead
Because I motivated the youth and got rich.
and spoke against the matrix i guess i'm a fucking villain
took the wrong career path.
Thank you.
If only I'd done it another way. To be fair, Kanye West has got some heat, to be fair.
To be fair to the guy.
But I'm definitely top three.
If I change careers,
If I'm belligerent to the police instead of nice and cooperative, if I use fake banknotes, if I take drugs, if I rob pregnant ladies, then I get to be a hero.
But instead I talk against the matrix. So I get to be one of the most picked on black men in history ever.
Thank you.
Thank you.
*sigh*
But it's fine.
Whew.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Mmm.
Cold coffee.
Bye.
Well, panic's over. It's all starting to wear off now. Just sorry, guys. You know, I just...
Thank you.
You know, it's just in bed and...
mid-pump.
I heard about Taylor Swift. I thought, fuck.
You know?
Had to do something.
Can't just let that go down without...
fighting back, you know, I have to do
Unbelievable. Never saw it coming.
someone like Taylor Swift who works for Sony,
and the matrix supporting the matrix candidate just wow
Never saw it coming. Wasn't preplanned.
Came out of fucking nowhere.
Unbelievable.
Thank you.
I woke Tristan up
By the way, if you're all wondering why his stupid ass ain't here, I knocked on his door. The video's on Twitter. I was like, Tristan, wake up.
Taylor Swift just endorsed Kamala.
He just told me to fuck off. I guess he just doesn't care.
Because some people just don't care about the important things in this world.
He just told me to fuck off and get the fuck away from his bedroom because he's asleep.
Guess he just didn't give a shit.
What can you do, right?
But at least I'm here fighting the good fight.
so uh maybe i should tweet at taylor swift say blink twice maybe i should tweet at her
and say,
Dance while singing. Dance while singing in your next show if you've been kidnapped by the Kamala campaign.
And I'll come save you.
You know, everything we just discussed about how they forced her.
Taylor Swift is secretly super racist.
She hates Kamala because she's black and I'm going to go down there on my jet. You better say if you dance in your next show.
while singing.
Because that would be a crazy coincidence. You don't dance and sing at the same time.
Unless you're trying to send a message. Dance and sing at the same time to let me know that you've been kidnapped by the Kamala campaign and you need Top G to come rescue you.
You know what? Don't we have AI or cartoons or something? Can't we make this whole thing? I mean, I could do a blockbuster, but I got to get out of Romania and fly to Hollywood. Can we like get a cartoon or AI? Can we just make all this plot?
Like as a trailer.
I'll tweet at her.
She'll see it.
I've got a big account. I'm a big deal.
I'm a big deal. I got 10 million followers. I'm a big deal.
Put a one in the chat if I should go wake Tristan up for being a little sleepy faggot.
He's been asleep for a full 50 minutes now. That's enough for any man.
Thank you.
Glad you all agree.
We've all had enough of his shit.
*Outro Music*
*
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Yeah.
I have a mission for you. Gather the team. Inside the cars you'll find wet suits. Put them on.
I'M GOING TO GO.
you
you
5 kilometers.
Nor is it a white vehicle.
You're dead.
Thank you.
you
*Sounds of a car*
Drive until you...
find a river.
Jump into the room.
- Yeah.
*Dramatic music*
- I'm coming.
Yeah.
- Okay.
another kilometer downstream.
you'll find a sheer rock wall.
Hidden in the bushes are rooms.
Repel.
down the rock wall to the next leg of your journey.
you
Bye.
The bottom of the river is a waterproof chest. Inside you'll find a package.
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Thanks for watching!
drive to the coordinates.
I just...
There you go.
amount
Take the cure we need.
provide.
and employment.
you
Rook Dane.
Nope.
Tom.
warpath.
five
that point.
want you.
of cold
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♪ ♪