Transcript
I shoot up a school. I'm joking. Luke's Oreo. Luke. He'd be king of the world. Lord Luke. They have a fucking genius.
Everyone's hate me. I'm so fucking cool. I'm so fucking cool. You know what? I really think no one hates you, though. Genuinely. The haters hate me, but they're just online trolls in their life. Yeah, weasels. I think they don't exist. In the real world, it's a happy world out here. Yep, it's a happy world out here. Everyone's happy in the real world. At the club, I was talking about six girls starting walks up. Takes all of them from me, and I just left. I was sad. That's why I disappeared. Friendship's worth more. Yeah, the friendship's worth more. Let's bury the hatchet. Just if I'm talking to someone, just back the fuck up. I know you're handsome and Richard and me. Both are very true.
Let's get this so much. Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Let's always get a picture. Dude, thank you so much, bro. Bro, I'm not like you. You're a different level. I thought, dude, I saw a video of you as like, C is for a casino or something. I think you love that shit. Yeah, but I'm trying to stay rich now. I already made it out. You already did it. I've done it now. I'm done. I'm trying to stay rich. I still got to get my Bugatti, bro. That's why I'm gambling. And then when I have Bugatti, then I'm out. All right, cool. There we go racing. Yeah, exactly. Let's go.
Eve, I love you!
Ladies and gentlemen, at the free ride, we've got to give this one part of the position. All three champions who are in this contest, one hundred, twenty -eight, twenty -eight, twenty -eight. One, two, three, four, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five, five,
You feel like you wanna just give up. But you gotta search within you. Try to find that inner strength and just pull that shit out of you. And get that motivation to not get up and not get quit at all. Now I'll add you one of this one that's flat on your face. So I collapse, I'm spilling these rats long as you fill them. To the day that I drop, you'll never say that I'm not killing them. Cause when I am not, then I'm gonna stop killing them. And I am not.
How you doing sir? Good? Thank you.
Can I lock it with the chio? With the chio print?
Oh, the hat! He needs the hat. He's the hat man. How's that? It suits you. Can I take a picture? Sure. I'm actually Mr. Excited now. You know the thing that's exciting me the most?
What the fact that the music already too loud and annoying me and I'm about 500 meters from the club nice very
How American is this? Zero American. 100%.
You can't make cowboy. You don't have a cowboy hat. Take your hat.
Good morning to you too. Is that what we do now?
- Good morning, Parker. - Drift is just here. - Thank you.
- So admit we're American. - Oh, we're super American. - Admit we're American. - What was American? - Tiffany Andrew Andrew. - Thanks. - Yeah, there's been a few racist Twitter posts.
You can say anything. I'm super racist here on Twitter. I think it's great. I think it's hilarious. Is there anything more American than driving from Las Vegas to Los Angeles and stopping at a 50s diner halfway through the desert? I feel as American as can be right now. I might buy a monster truck. Might shoot up a school. Okay. Nice. I'm joking. AG of Florida. I'm joking. And AG of California. But yeah, I feel American. What else can I do that's American?
If he could control himself in front of a fucking pack of cookies, instead of
having a complete loss of all cognitive function like a child he'd be living in a completely different world right now he'd be king of the world he'd be king of the world all the nations would have united under lord luke instead he's sitting outside a diner dying of a cold
Because he couldn't fucking help himself, and he ate the Oreo. Luke, eat peppery beef, Chuckie. He'll cure you.
That's all.
What'd you get? You want some beef jerky? Why would I have beef jerky when I'm about to have the greatest food on planet earth? Because we're in fucking America. Beef jerky and Slim Jims. That is pretty American, not gonna lie. That damn right it is.
I'm a little more something American. What's American? A cheeseburger. A milkshake or a cheeseburger? Whatever it is I order, it has to be American.
How much? I think we have seven. Yeah, we have two more. Thank you. Thank you. Are you sitting down? King Kong Monster Boy. Half a pound.
I wouldn't poison you just to get good content laughing at you while you're poisoned. I'd never do that.
Give yourself a double thumbs up and a pat on the back. That will cheer you up. Do you feel better? You sure? You look like you feel better.
Cheers fellas. To Luke's health. Oh, cheers.
This place must be burned.
It's worth it out fast. See, I'm a fucking genius. I'll try some. You wish. I'll order mine. Just admit, I order in the American. I admit. See you a minute? You admit it, yeah? Yeah. Because I'm not scared of you. I don't want a whole other.
You're not a tough guy.
There's no salt on your crackers, sir. There is. I just ate crackers with salt. There is no salt on your crackers. I admit it. I admit it. You're the greatest. There's no salt on my crackers. Got him. We're trying to sink her.
What do you want? No.
It's diabetic poison in a glass. And this morning, when I said, you want breakfast, blah, blah, blah.
because sugar is going to make me feel sick. That's what he said to me.
You know what I've been in mind? You can throw up a whole pocket. I'm like when women accuse men of being all you're in charge of everything. We're perfectly fine, thank you. Tell me what would make Luke feel better. You know what would make you feel bare, Luke? Drinking a pint of straight vodka and then going out and sitting in the desert sun for 13 hours. You know what would make you feel bare? Driving straight back to Vegas, taking all the money you have and spinning it at the casino wheels.
mind to a future reality where your body's not sick anymore and exists inside of that reality and you have a brand new consciousness where you don't feel sick. Easy.
That's it. In a week you're not going to be sick, so just forward your brain, fast forward like a cassette player. Blink through the space-time continuum. Blink enough times. Even a week from now. So just forward your brain up. You're fine. You know what actually makes you feel better? I'm not joking. If you drank this whole thing of Tabasco, that would definitely cure you. Can you admit if I was sick like you, I'd do that. Andrew, admit it. I would do it. If you drank all this Tabasco, it would make you feel better. I guarantee it.
How long before Tristan asked me for a deep fried pickle? I would like a deep fried pickle, please. Immediately. That was pretty instant. I've made the best choices so far. I admit that I would like a deep fried pickle, yes.
in my life. You know what old buddy? Sure.
Thanks for having me. They even give you some different sauce. Thank you. Now did you do that because you don't like them? I did it because I felt sorry for you. Because I've never seen such a tiny little man living such a pathetic existence. That's why I gave you two of mine. Okay?
I did it.
My self-esteem is at an all-time love. This will cure Luke. Luke, the acidity of the pickle kills germs.
I need to mess with all of them. I ordered them. I ordered them.
Can't do that.
I'm a chicken fried sandwich.
Come to the crushing realization, man. Cousins are just scams. There's no single thing as a cousin. It's just something your parents, siblings, children do to hang out with you. They made up the word. Running a scam.
Scammed his way in using that old line. Gave it a title like it matters. Called himself my cousin.
That was so shitty. I wish we could recreate that. Why are you laughing? That was so bad. Luke is tired of your bullshit. Bullshit? That was a good one. You even laughed at one of my jokes like that in a couple days.
And I repeat, Luke, a curly fry will make you feel better because F stands for feel better, Luke. Yeah, fries begin with F, and F stands for feel better, Luke. You should really eat an onion ring.
Because onion begins with O, which we all know stands for, oh, why won't you feel better, Luke?
Cheese will make you feel better.
begins with CH. And as we know, that stands for "Cheer Up and Feel Better, Luke." You should drink some water, because water begins with a W. And as we all know, W stands for, "Won't You Please Feel Better, Luke." You should really drink a milkshake. The milkshake begins with M. And as we know, M stands for "Make Sure You Feel Better Soon, Luke."
Yeah they said you was high dressed, but that was just a lie. Well you ain't never... And T stands for tired of seeing you feel sorry for yourself Luke. Luke, you should look that way. Bailey's pointing a camera at you. And as you know, camera begins with a C. And C stands for can't you just cheer up and feel better Luke?
California, California.
*music* Flat, left, hook! *music* *music* I'm not trying to challenge you. It's all in my arm. *music* Eat a fucking skin, you cunt.
for the rest of my life. I hate everybody like that. Living like this isn't an accident. The private booths that you would see, surrounded by champions. The best tables at the most exclusive clubs. The freedom to wake up one day in Dubai and end the night in Beverly Hills. This life is built, earned, won. But most people, they just watch. They watch from the cheap seats while the real players sit cage-side. They walk past luxury hotels while others check in without thinking twice. They scroll past stacks of cash, diamond watches, and first-class flights, wondering why it's never them.
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