Transcript
So
you
Roadman Part 3.
Part three.
At this point, I think it is.
*Muchas music*
I like your hat.
I'm a little jealous.
You look like Uncle Eddie from the Grizzwolds. Do you know who that is? The fuck is Uncle Eddie from the Grizzwolds?
I have absolutely no idea who that is.
genuinely deep you could put him in front of me and say what's this person's name for 10 million i don't have a fucking clue
Is this the crap you watch in Texas, Bailey? Is this what you do when you sit around?
on your farms.
watching Griswold's
Weirdos, waiting for a legal immigrant to break into your house.
- Nothing. - Is that your life?
- I guess.
Seems so.
Yeah.
You ready to be on the road again?
I am actually a road man
Actually, yes.
Built for the road. Road man.
Where are we going today?
Somewhere deep into the mountains.
to hide from civilization.
and decot.
Let's see how it goes. Let's go.
Thank you.
It's four hours and 18 minutes to the first destination. At least we've still got Kossith Gergo.
and his
bangers
To keep us motivated on the drive. I've yet to play it because I'm saving it To replace sleep when I'm really tired. I'll put it on and I'll feel rejuvenated
and entertained.
*sniff*
Everyone's a dipshit and nobody seems to realize that.
All the people you rely on, your dentist, your doctor, they're a dipshit.
The nurse in the fucking hospital is a dipshit. The police are dipshits.
Everyone's a dipshit. You're driving around, you're living in this society, all the people in the cars around you are dipshits.
They're all fucking stupid. If you were to get them all, if you were to get all the people I just described and put them in a line and say,
Tell me your name, tell me your age, and tell me something
remarkable about you.
Not only would most of them have nothing to say, even worse, most of them couldn't even construct a sentence.
They go, "Oh, my name is uh..."
Uh, Robert and I am 34. And uh, shut the fuck up you dumb cunt.
You can't even fucking tell me your name and age. It takes a fucking full minute. There's nothing interesting about you at all to say, and you cannot put together a compendious, interesting sentence in the only language you speak, which is English.
People say to me all the time, "Andrew, I love how you talk on your podcast. I love the way you get your ideas across. It's really interesting and engaging." And I say, "Yeah, but you have not seen it from the flip side. You don't see how annoying that is for me to listen to any of you dipshits." Because none of you can fucking speak. Nobody can say anything in a way which is less than infuriating. I just have to sit there and listen to people stumble their way through the English language, their own fucking lives. And then I'm like, "Okay, dummy. So what's your job?" "Oh, I'm a judge." "Oh, fuck's sake. Great."
Great.
Definitely not toast.
Fuck society
We're going to the mountains and we're hiding from everyone. We're going to try to avoid as many dipshits as possible. That's our plan. Go deep, deep, deep into the mountains. And if you say I'm that guy from that fucking show again.
You're going missing. Fuck you. One less Texan in Romania. Who gives a shit? Nobody.
- More about my street cred.
I'm built different.
JoJo is 14, singing about her relationship troubles.
- She had no clue.
Still a banger though.
She didn't have a clue. Wait till you're 37 with 25 women. Jeez.
Why are you impulsively shopping for more things at the gas station? You don't need anything else.
And you know I'm right.
We're looking for one of these.
I'm looking for one of these.
Nice.
I'm one of these.
- Thank you.
We need Nerf guns. How many cars are there? There's our car, Tristan's car, security, and the SSB car. Carrying the very important games console SSB. Sorry to feed me. Let me pop out of all of you.
in the mountains. Because you cannot escape destiny. Even if you leave the house, you need your endless searching retribution. SSB is essential. Exactly. So it's got its own designated car to make sure it gets there. Wait, did we pack the UNO? Genuine question. We need an UNO car now. We've got the SSB car. Let's find the UNO car.
*music* We're in the middle of nowhere, there's gonna be barrels.
Who cares?
I'm scared of bears. Bears are scared of me. Bro, I'm not trying to be an easy mule for a bear.
There's a 70% chance we're gonna see a bear. We're going bear hunting. If a bear sees us,
spot.
We're gonna go find a bear.
And in fact, you know what?
I like bears.
Bears.
If I was an animal, I'd be a bear.
They're my spirit animal.
because
Everyone thinks they're cuddly and cute, and they're brown, and they're warm.
and everyone loves them and when people see them they're like aww just like me Top G
And he's big and warm and brown.
But if you piss him off,
Everyone dies.
Ah!
Everyone dies. And I feel like that's basically me.
So I actually like bears. So when I find the bear, what I'm going to do is say, hello, bear. I'm one of you.
I invite you to the mansion to come live with me.
What could possibly go wrong? I won't even have to tame the bear.
He's just going to naturally agree and say, ah, the bear king.
Top G, G stands for bear.
I'm gonna come live with you and the guys. Admit it'd be more interesting episodes and a more interesting life. It was all of us in the house plus a bear. It might be pretty cool. So we're gonna find him now.
and invite him. Alright, let's go.
I like your hiking shoes by the way. Oh yeah, I'm very well prepared. You weren't prepared.
Sweatpants, Hugo Boss shoes.
Have you got waterproof boots on? I don't know. I don't know what these are. Oh god, you're so gay. My feet will get wet and cold. Your mate Alex got them for me. I don't know. You are so gay. All you people with your...
My feet will get wet and cold.
What next?
Transgender? Is that what's next?
My feet will get soaking wet and freezing cold. And I'll just deal with it like a fucking man.
Who cares?
Bro, that's not funny. That's not a spherical movement. In the winter, you can see it moving up the hill.
Funny, funny ain't nothing to do with it. I'm just saying it. There's a bear, I'll tell you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Tristan has his tactical knife, we're fine. Yeah, we are fine. Well, I'm fine.
You could catch me.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Right, I think we take a left here.
Wait a second.
Thank you.
Okay.
This is getting awfully white.
awfully white.
Let's take a look.
in the woods
The only thing worth seeing, I've already seen. His name's Saxophone Mage.
already spoke to
That's where horror movies happen.
White people enjoyed for some reason... - Some of the greater mages in these woods
That was great, man.
Don't say that again.
Thank you.
You hear me? Don't say that again. Don't say that again. There are maids great in him, I don't care. Turn left to what? Watch out, this is bullshit!
Why do you want to walk in a massive circle? What's the point?
What's the objective?
Explain hiking to me. Make this make sense.
You walk and then you come home. Is that what happens?
- -
Why the fuck do you people do this?
if you survive.
Sounds gay.
I'm doing it, but I want you all to know I'm extremely upset by this.
Good.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Okay.
Yeah.
- That's pretty.
- Three, two, one, yeah.
That was great guys. That was so much fun. I totally get why you white people love hiking.
Totally get it.
Totally understand. That was so much fun.
See you home.
- Yeah.
- Boring. - Andrew, we just started.
Thank you.
Thank you.
If we all go back home, that would be the ultimate joke on T. What if we just all collectively turned around and went home? I must go with him. Sorry bro, I have to go as well. Why?
It's cardio man! Yeah we need to do our training
In the middle of the woods, where the bears are.
- Bro, you don't feel the oxygen, you don't feel the...
Negative Ions I can breathe in the hot tub antioxidants
India! Bro, we can breathe in the hot tub. It's the same oxygen over there as it is up here.
Exactly. We're in the middle of nowhere. It's powerful.
You don't feel the spirit of the...
No.
The spirit of the tree? No, it's bullshit.
You must feel it.
Just relax. Alex.
debris
You want some actual advice?
Okay.
It's six hours to the top of the mountain and back. Then let's all wake up tomorrow morning at eight and go.
We walked a six hour up the mountain road.
What are you talking about? Who walks for six hours in a forest on his woods that we know nothing about? And march up. It's six hours to the mountaintop. Let's do it tomorrow morning.
No!
You went out? Of course! Not do it at all! 100% alright! Fuck the hike now, it's getting dark anyway! No, we're not, no! No! No! We're not wake up at 6 o'clock! Or whatever time tomorrow, it could be a 6 hour hike, that's ridiculous! *laughs*
That's actually a bad idea.
three hundred
Thank you.
Thank you.
Bye.
So this...
So the judge said we're allowed to travel all of Romania, so we left Romania and then DCOT is now saying that we have to come back today to sign in Bucharest.
because if we don't, they're going to put us back in house
I don't know how D-Cock can supersede a judge.
It doesn't even make sense. So our surveillance officer called us and said, "You have to come back right now."
So brother, just so we can travel all over mania. Oh, you have to come back now. You have to come back now.
Make it make sense.
We literally drove six hours over here. We've been here less than 24 hours. Now we have to drive all the way back.
- Make a mess. - Where's he? - It's abusive.
DCOT are being abusive because they know they have no case and they're just trying to fuck with us any way that they can.
Ay ay ay.
Roadmen! Roadmen, bro.
Oh well.
Back to McCrest.
When you're on judicial control in Romania, you're typically signed twice a week.
Maybe once a week.
We have to sign every single day.
abusive measures.
unprecedented, never done before.
But...
It was no big deal because we were stuck in Bucharest anyway, right?
And then the judge said: "You can travel all of Romania, but how do you travel all of Romania if you have to sign in Bucharest every single day?"
We did an agreement.
that will sign our local police station.
No problem, we went away last week.
signed at a local police station each day
like we were supposed to on time.
and I had absolutely zero problems.
We just drove here, it took 6.5 hours to get to this location.
This morning we went to sign at a local police station and D-Cott said no.
You must return to Bucharest to sign in Bucharest.
They're superseding the judge and the judge's decision that we can travel all over Mania, saying that we must
sign there.
Now, are they doing this because they're concerned we're gonna run away? No.
Are they doing this because they want to preserve law and order? No. They're doing this to try and upset me.
And the reason they're doing it is because when we went away last week,
We made a really cool video
Avast
with the dog sleds and the Carpathian Mountains and we had a great time.
And we put that last night on Rumble.
Last night!
The prosecutor saw how much fun we have while we're away.
And this morning, he calls and demands that we come back to Bucharest
Because even though the judge said we're allowed,
Because he's that much of a hateful.
And he's trying to make me frown.
But I don't frown.
I smile.
I may have driven six and a half hours to get here and wake up the next devs, drive six and a half hours home.
But I get to drive six and a half hours in this.
You understand?
All the Brokies who hate on me in the system can't afford one of these.
Jesus Christ.
So that's the win.
But I guess, you know,
systems abusive
But it's not just Romania, all systems are.
So it's been a relatively short trip.
But I'm pretty excited to drive my car again.
So all in all,
smiles all around.
Fireblood makes your piss yellow. Like a man. Manly yellow piss. None of that clear water gay little girl piss. Man's piss. And the reason for that is very simple. We have all of the vitamins, minerals and amino acids the body can need in one convenient scoop of Fireblood. And like a man, we have made it excessive.
and your pee's not even yellow because there's only a little bit of vitamins in it. Oh, but I've only got my daily recommended allocation of vitamin B12. I'm scared I might pee out too many vitamins. Greta Thunberg will get mad at me for being wasteful. I don't want Greta to come into the gym and beat me up. Fucking gay.
Music