Transcript
you do don't you rice and beans you do that
If there was a border, what would you do?
I'd cross it.
♪
What's this?
I don't know. Do you know, Tristan?
I mean, I'm Lord of the Bubbles. There's no bubbles here. But I mean, I'm Lord of the Bubbles.
He may have the psychic power to control the bubbles. No, he's doing on this thing. What he's doing on that thing is completely unrelated.
Completely unremitting. It's alright.
It's the hot I see him clicking things And then you put it down Do you admit
That you've been praying for my downfall since your inception. No, I haven't. Ah, I've been bubble attacked. I hope they can no longer hear us.
It's a secret to make unlimited money.
*music*
- Can I have a hug? - Yeah. - Okay. - Okay. Thank you very much. Very nice. - Okay. - Very nice. - Gotcha! - It's not. - It's a Volkswagen. It's a Volkswagen. Fancy Volkswagen. Hey, Kirill, go with Luke, okay? See you later.
- Good.
So I'm still Mexican.
You've been Mexican ever since Alaska.
All you do is lose. I know. But I'm super close. And then he rolled this one. He rolled this on me. Of course I didn't lose it.
No Mexicans ever beat me at dominoes.
I'm Mexican, aren't I? You keep playing and you keep losing. No, but I'm going to win this one somehow. Go on then. Man. Win.
- Okay.
Double sixes.
Fuck, I only got the one six. So that's six and then one two.
- Four or five. - I thought that was a double five. - Yeah, I said it live. Five, one, two, three, four. - Okay. - It's done for you, my friend. - That was long. - Can you admit you're Mexican? - Nah, I get loads of double sixes. - What's your favorite food? Do you eat guacamole?
Shit. One, two, three, four.
Sorry. One, two, three, four. One, two. Do you eat guacamole? I might. Do you eat tacos? I might like tacos. Do you eat enchiladas? I might. I think you do. I really might. I think you do.
Thank you.
Thank you.
five
and four.
What's your native language? Spanish. Where were you born?
Mexico. What's your favorite food? Tacos. No Mexican will ever beat me at dominoes.
Difficult Sunday afternoon, have my coffee.
in my jacuzzi in my compound with my armed security outside
Bin Laden's compound was next. Steel Team 6 would take more bullets on their way into my compound than they did into Obama. Osama's, sorry. Obama, Osama, same thing. Same team. Anyway, can you zoom in on my bagaia? Can you see the very back of the bagaia there? Just so they can see the 5.2 million year old.
Pagani-Chiron Pure Sport, number 18 of 60 in the world, the only one in the Balkans.
owned by Andrew Dickey, Boxing Hall Champion. I came from nothing. My rise was meteoric.
Ocean, Indiana, Gary, Indiana, Detroit, Luton, the worst town in England. Now I'm sitting around with so much money. Someone said to me yesterday, "Your Bugatti, that's like 3 million Euro." And I was offended. This cost me 5.2 million Euro. Do you have any idea how much options cost a Bugatti?
You think that sunroof was free, my G? It costs more than your house! VAT? Bro, 5.2M. I'm going to buy another Bugatti. Or a Pagani. Or a Kerns. I've already started sending emails. I have to buy something else. People still seem to think I'm broke.
I have absolute disdain for the poor because I started lower. All these other people on Twitter, all these other mudder coaches, they start better than me.
I'm not trying to give this the age old adage of start poor, get rich. I started at the bottom of the bomb. And the reason I got rich is because I am not stupid. I am not arrogant. And I am not lazy.
If you are poor, you're one of those three things. You're either too arrogant to listen, too stupid to learn, or too lazy to try.
It's impossible to be poor with, unless you are one of those three things. And stage one to becoming rich is to identify which one you are. Are you lazy?
Be honest.
How hard do you really work? How much TV did you watch yesterday?
Did you have a nap? You had a nap, didn't you? You're a fuck-up. Are you arrogant? When I sit here and say, look...
Big Don, I'm gonna teach you how to make money. Do you sit there and go, I don't wanna listen to this guy, 'cause I have to do it myself.
If you could do it yourself, you wouldn't be fucking broke. What'd you broke eat?
Where's your Bugatti?
No, you haven't fucking got one. Where's your compound?
When SEAL Team Six come for you, you're gonna fucking die!
You're a loser. I hate the poor. They all deserve it.
Thank you.
Thank you.
The gods hate me. The dice gods. They hate me. This is like our 10th game. I know. He just got double fives and I am not getting any doubles. I need more dribbles. No Mexican has ever beaten me at dominoes. You can't be Mexican. You're Mexican.
Six, three. Six.
All we do is play this game and all I do is win. We don't even film all my endless winning.
Double fours, of course, because no Mexicans ever beat me at dominoes. One, two, three, four. Just, you know, endlessly win. It's no big deal. I needed those. Oh, if you need them, just roll them. Just roll a double. If you need it, just roll it.
No, not like that. That's shit. If you need a double, just roll the double like I do.
That's exactly how it works. You can't get another double.
Okay. Well, it doesn't really matter. Because now you... Yeah.
Thank you.
This is stupid. I can't. The one is completely useless. One, two, three, four.
Luke, what country are you from? Mexico. I like coffee. I eat enchiladas. I like extra guacamole. You do, don't you? And rice and beans. You do, don't you? Yeah, that's what I do.
If there was a border, what would you do?
I'd cross it.
So it's another game.
And this one, I don't know if there's any pros who can see who's winning.
Luke.
Is it my roll? No, I just rolled a five and a six. You haven't gone and sold tacos. No. Now you're eating donuts. What do you mean? You are a fucking... I know what you mean. Admit it. And I am so far.
You never win. Yet to win so far. There's about 15 games. I know. Yes.
Thank you.
True. I have zero, as you can tell, I'm not intimidated because Mexicans have never been the dominos.
I'm going to win this one. I feel it.
So it was a five and a six and I move them, right?
I'd love to go get the camera.
Yeah, you're good.
I already moved? Yeah. Yes, five and six. How I nonchalantly eat my food and play the game at the same time because I have no threats.
Six in one.
Thank you.
one two three four five six
Mm-hmm. And one.
Nice and easy.
Turn on the recorder, Luke. Turn on the recorder and admit. What are you? I'm Mexican. Because we haven't finished the game yet. We haven't finished the game yet, but it's quite the gods. There was a point I didn't record it.
where I could have done it if I just rolled a three.
I'm Mexican, but I speak English. Nice try, bro. You're still a Mexican. Where are you from? Go and finish the game. Finish the game and see where your passport is issued. I'm from Mexico. Well, let's find out. The game's not over yet. You still chanted chants.
*door slams*
*clap*
So I got wrecked.
- Where's your passport issued?
Mexico.
I like burritos. I like tacos. You do, don't you?
Somehow, I keep losing at this game, but it doesn't make sense. It makes sense. No Mexican has ever beaten me at dominoes. I said that to you before we started playing backgammon, and you thought it was unrelated. But clearly, you now accept that it is related. If I be related. It must be, because you never win.
How did I get so red? You're Mexican.
You're Mexican. - We didn't even take any other people from each other. - If you were to go into the cheapest, most terrible Italian restaurant in America,
the people who are cooking the food would be
Mexican.
That's right. That's you.
Accept it.
Thank you.
*sad music*
you
*wind blowing*
*
- Bye.
*Outro Music*
So.
We play again.
This is Take Confidential now. We don't do anything else.
What else do millionaires do? So are you winning or losing? I'm losing again. Oh, you're losing again. Yeah. Surely, at a game of dice, you can't lose every fucking game. But then again, wait. I know. Which country are you from? I don't know.
Mexico. Shit!
Ah!
Okay, well, at least I can do one and then one, two, three. Get these guys out. It's not too bad.
Maybe I can win.
I just need more doubles
double sixes
Bye.
Shit.
And then 1 -1. Which isn't ideal. Not ideal.
5 -2.
5-2.
3 -5.
Shit.
1 -2 -3 -4 -5.
1-2-3-4-5. 3.
I need him to get only ones.
Shit I get shit rolls. That's not why you lose the dice gods don't like that's not why you lose I know it's not you're making correct moves. I
Bye.
You make incorrect moves, Luke, and that's why you lose. Well, it's over anyway. And you know why you make incorrect moves? Because I'm Mexican. Because you speak Spanish, don't you? I do. I'm speaking Spanish right now.
you
So.
I eat tacos.
- Somehow. - What's your favorite food? - Tacos. - Do you have salsa on your food? - Yes.
Admit you don't have a social security number. I don't. You don't do you? I don't. No because where were you born?
Mexico.
-
I'm sorry.
*knock knock*
So Alex is going to win. He says he's going to win. He says he's not Mexican. He swears. He swears he's born in Romania. Yeah. So he says he's Romanian. It's a Romanian game.
And they play it in Romania often. We're going to find out. She might be lying.
Wait, I don't know your...
Copy. So he's already set you up wrong.
Thank you.
not a good start there's actually like uh two type of alex say yes so i can actually start here you're mexican so if two pieces here nachos are there and then we're the where are the tacos i got it uh where did the tacos go
- That's cool. - That was it.
Ah, the two pieces there. No, no, tacos.
*Outro Music*