0:31.06Good shot there from Tate!

0:37.98The End

0:39.57I should be in Valencia. This morning Andrew said would you like to take a little... Por favor, no molesting.

0:45.93Thank you.

0:46.71No molesting.

0:48.11Por favor, no the less. Fuck this! Let's go. Let the door is a shithole.

1:21.79I'm gonna do some fitting in. No more lesson.

1:42.73I don't know if it's not been another big pun. But another way, Spanish. I'm gonna suck these balls. Navigate me a better door.

1:43.25I thought everything's supposed to be free in this socialist shit hole. You have to pay the drive.

2:07.53Spain is a failed society.

2:15.04*music* We should give something next. Listen, no need to be a little baby Mike. Snacks. What's it say on this box? Right here. I'll show you fucking snacks, mate. Snack it up.

2:31.30I need more of these.

2:43.42Now we're talking. Please go screwdriver. Some more. Some more. You think you guys want to do it? A lot of the minas? Well done.

2:56.26Ooh, funny. Oh, no. Oh, no.

3:04.04- Yes? - Yes.

3:07.81Oh!

3:08.71Nope.

3:09.34Oh, wait.

3:10.08I'm going to go.

3:25.14I'm going to eat some of these sweets after suicide.

4:04.72*BOOM*

4:07.20Here, Mike, you're drinking with me. Can't drink alone, it's bad luck. You can have a gin tonic, girl have a whiskey cola. Not Coke. Cola. Cheers, Mike. Cheers, man. Enjoy your drive, Andrew.

4:24.08It's fantastic.

4:28.76It's not crime.

4:34.74It's mixed isn't it? Fucking hell. Splash of lemon. I'll crack you open a G &T. Are you scared of that happening? That you're gonna drink this drink and you're gonna crash and die because of the drink. Have a fucking drink. I don't want a drink. I want one. I'm drinking. It's nothing to do with driving because I want one. So you don't want a nice cold gin and tonic. Let me review it. Let's see how refreshing it is in a tent.

5:00.50Oh that's a beautiful mix G &T. Try a sip of that.

5:06.90Oh you don't want it do you? It's quite refreshing actually. Don't lie to yourself for your beverage on earth. We're going to kill us because of your hydrogen and tonic. It's impossible. What better beverage to drink while driving across Spain than a hydrogen and tonic? I know. Keep it sharp, keep it focused. I can't think of any drink which would be encouraged by the Spanish police force to a higher regard than a refreshing cold G&T. I know. It's the Spanish police force.

5:34.92Spanish way, it's the continental way. Absolutely. Cheers.

5:40.36Drink up, Mike. No free passes on this one. Conde Benidorm. Height of class. And you can drink and drive, you can drink and film. Booze and cruise. Exactly. I don't drink and drive, I booze and cruise.

5:54.58Hello. Hi. España es una sociedad falida.

6:00.44Thank you.

6:29.72I'm going to go ahead and get out of here.

6:39.57I think I'm pronouncing it right.

6:41.66So I guess have to the beat to drink some pints. Go-kart. Google go-kart and better than it.

6:51.82Closed on Sunday. Same reason the spa was closed. Failed society. So on Sunday things are closed.

7:34.72days, Sunday's the day that you'd want to go to the fucking spa, surely. Failed society. Actually quite nice.

7:35.08okay so what did you say hello I'm interested in the Segway tour for four people sorry only available tomorrow also on Wednesday. I'll respond to him don't worry I know Spanish.

7:50.42I hope he gets the message.

7:58.34Upstairs in the restaurant it's

8:01.71- 7 o'clock. - 7 o'clock?

8:05.17failed to save it.

8:07.62like a bar, if you want to do something, it's okay.

8:10.21Bar. Alright, they said the bar will come back in 20 minutes. Yeah? Alright, I'll tell you the bar will come back in 20 minutes. 20 minutes ago we went to check in. She said it's going to take a little bit to check in three minutes. Let's go do the same. So we'll do the same. 22 minutes, I went over there. Are you ready? Not yet. Still frantically pressing buttons on the computer.

8:36.56So we finished our work, which is classified. We're in Benidorm, which is obviously famous for its top quality nightlife in 1975. The best of Britain come here. They don't. The scum of England. You can't go. I think we go out and make Mike drink until he throws up. Mike is my bad. A place like Benidorm, as terrible as it is, is going to be far worse with Mike.

9:05.52Sorry my trooper, as you know, Andrew and myself are classy guys. Classy believers are hanging out in the finest places. However, English people have a reputation for when they go on holiday, becoming the biggest scumbags on earth. And we're in scumbag central. So tonight I'm going to show you how English people

9:24.44do holidays in Bellador. I'm not a millionaire tonight. I'm not Tristan Tate. I'm not classy. I'm English. Prepare yourself.

9:38.94Remember this mug from the Easy Jeff likes.

9:43.24Works so well it didn't even bother.

9:45.91Spain is a failed society. Back in the day, EasyJet didn't use to issue seat numbers. You used to have to get on the plane and just sit down where you liked.

9:54.56So me and Andrew would sit at the back with a seat in between us and look big and mean like this. And every single time, unless the flight was totally fully booked, no one would sit in the middle of us and we got extra space. That was our move.

10:37.45We're poor today. 300 euros alcohol bottle.

10:39.49I'm too partial Benny's arms, don't go near me! He does think he's partial, he's stuck up, he is stuck up with that. He looks a bit stuck up. He's only partial in my mania. He's stuck up! That's the fit one, we want that one. That one's married but he's married. I'm married but I am fit. That one's stuck up. I need to flex that. Never mind. Mr. Benny, Mr. Benny, I need to flex that. I don't fucking understand anything.

11:18.85I have the 50 cent. I have the 50 cent.

11:24.51I do worry. I'm not saying.

11:28.95Get your ass out.

11:37.47I'm gonna get a tip. I'm gonna need a couple euro tips. Used to give me what I desire. Don't do any, don't do any. I am worried. I'm from Germany. Hey, my name is German. Germany is a failed society. I'm gonna beat Germany. Don't go, don't go. Worst country in Europe. Who'd be getting an lesbian? I'm not an lesbian. I'm just putting a serial killer.

12:37.45I'm sorry, not sorry!

12:38.53I'm gonna break his neck. Woo! Now those things look like you're sliding around. There's a single metal wire running from top to bottom. Guaranteed, those things are just made to the illusion of... Ah, there's a circle. Oh, really? A metal wire. Maybe.

12:55.79That's it, that's it.

13:37.43Man, you're fucking dumb. Are you afraid?

14:02.43I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a little bit more than a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I'm a kid. I

14:07.75For five minutes I had fun in there. For five minutes. Very ironically. Everyone else was there actually having a good time. It was like a joke. But they were all like actually enjoying it. Jesus Christ. I'm going to kill myself with boobs.

14:37.87you