Transcript
Good shot there from Tate!
you
So Tristan you're lying to me. You see his shoes. Yeah.
You ever heard the lyric?
and 50 cent
Holler at a hoe till I got the bitch confused.
She's got on paid less.
I've gone alligator shoes. I'm wearing gator shoes.
What's my job? The IMP.
*Burps*
That was very easy.
That is very nice.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
and you have things in your bag that you can't have normally. I didn't realize that part. I've got cigar covers, I've got
- It's absolutely surprising.
- One of us.
- Thank you.
Like
- Fast and cheap.
- What the must? - Yeah.
That was very fast. Very fast, yeah.
through the other people here.
Yeah.
just off.
- Here you go.
- Yeah.
- I'm gonna go.
-
*Birds*
- Okay.
-
I'm going to go.
yeah
- Thank you.
- Okay.
So when I woke up this morning,
This is not what I was expecting. Well, what were you expecting? A rub down on a shiatsu?
Had to get to London.
Couldn't find any other flights, last minute, blah, blah. Because I decided to spend all the money.
Now we're here.
I thought I was a private game.
Yeah, privately.
I'll eject this planet.
Thank you.
Is this real?
We just walked in.
It was very quick.
Thank you.
Exactly. I was walking off. Yeah. Taxi. It's basically a taxi. Air taxi, yeah.
So, a cashed crypto decided
It's a private plane to begin our journey.
But we do another problem, which I don't want to quite outline.
but our journey involves long driving
But I didn't have time to move cars from Romania to England.
You can never find any of them on private jet. So I've had to get real cars.
Yeah.
So out of the million,
We've already gone like half left.
Thank you.
I knew it. New cards. I told you, didn't I?
I see everything he books and everything he does. There are no secrets for me.
You get booking confirmations for all of this stuff.
No smoke. No secrets. No mirrors. It's just Andrew spending money. Well I'm having fun on the adventure so far. So am I. I don't think anyone's unhappy.
I'm only unhappy that Luke is here because when I was 23 I wasn't on No Private Gen.
I was on Easy Jam.
and it's taken me 32 years to fly on these. I feel like Luke,
jump the
Difficult phase. Straighter? No. Straighter. I'll show you guys something that's never been done before.
I'll do it. Private Jai Kido. I think I did it slightly before you though. I'm a pioneer.
So, the problem is when you use a character like Dalson, he's good at the long range, but if I can rush you with E-Honda, I always beat you with a thousand headsets. I've seen the best Street Fighter player in the world win with Dalson against everyone. So yeah, he's slow, but I need to learn his close combat techniques, so that I'll beat him. But when you play, you're a rubber.
Yoga fire. No, it doesn't work though. You have to stretch your arm. I jump, sweep, bear hug. I'm gonna yoga fire you. No, the thousand man slap is too fast. It's too fast. I'm gonna beat you at Street Fighter. Bro, I've beaten you the last, what, six, seven times in a row? In a row. Never lost. It has anything to do with the character choice.
You know all those guys on the internet are like, "Look, I want a Jag." So all the times I flew on perfect planes, I never did a video explaining how you could make money, da da da. I just flew on private planes. Because if you fly on a private plane, then you start doing a sales video and then you look like one of those dudes and like the jet's on the ground. You know, I mean, we're not on the ground.
Oh, he can fly for 40 grand a time, he's not really rich. So I never really wanted to do a straight video on a plane. So this video is about how I don't want to do a video on a plane. Because I don't own the plane. I own all my supercars. I own my big house. I know how to make enough money to pay 40 grand every time I fly. 40 G's, yeah, let's go here. 40 G's, yeah, let's go here. Most people, that's like a life savings. But I don't own the plane. And I don't want any one of those internet markers. So I'm not going to do a video on the plane.
But this is a video on the plane.
Meat and cheese is always a good combination.
I'm on a diet.
Don't eat meat and cheese. Meat and cheese in the nose. First thing in the morning? Rubbish. Tristan, why are you open champagne? What do you mean? You just said you're on a diet. Meat and cheese is rubbish in the morning. So? Champagne? Isn't that like apple juice? Yeah, it's fruit juice. It's like grapes.
You're French. Would you like some? I will have some.
We will have some here. Fuck you, little.
Now would you actually like some? I would. I feel like this is going to be a get. I knew it. I did call it though. You called it. I did call it. Not really. You even call someone. Yeah. I felt that one in my bones. There's no one else to give it to.
I was actually going to drink a couple of myself.
Just enough left, just a minute ago. Cheers. Rory.
I don't even like champagne.
It does taste good on a private plane though. But you're not going to drink champagne on a private plane. Cheers. Don't worry look there's another bottle I'll get out of it.
Private planes are the way. I think they're the way forward. You know why? Private planes have solved an amazing problem that me and Andrew have had. We hated flying first class and business class everywhere. But when you do inter-European flights, you only have, listen, you only have the low cost airspace.
There are no first class dumps receipts from Bucharest to Berlin. Here's the way.
You know what? I think we're at a higher altitude than a commercial plane. Nah, I didn't. I don't think so. Then why is the flight time cut by an hour? Quite faster. Planes don't fly as fast as I can, they fly as I can often see. Yeah, like a car driving at 56 miles an hour at the end of my fuel.
Time is the enemy of the rich man and cost is the enemy of the poor man. So when you're selling to the masses, you don't say, "Oh, it's 30 minutes quicker." It's double the price. You're like, "Well, 30 minutes." People wait for buses, bro. Poor people will wait an hour for a bus. I used to wait for buses. Poor people have time.
They don't have any fucking money.
That's why a plane flies at the most economical possible speed for the engines they have. This is for the engines by taking. I don't... preference is the only one I can think of. And this also happens to be the one I only like. So I say give me this for a day. They ask me breakfast. People are weird about wine. What's your preference of wine? To be fair, I now believe it. The type of dude who fly on these lights are people.
I'll drink to that, Talies. I'll drink to that. Luke, would you like some champagne? No. Are you sure? I'm done getting got. No more getting got on the plane. Listen, now you have to drink some champagne. No, you don't want to get Luke. What? Making him drink. Yeah. He doesn't want to drink. It's true. I just worked it out. He's doing a living. Take your glass or your own. I'm not going to get you. Like a man.
*laughter* *laughter* He saw it! Almost got it! *laughter* I saw it! Immediately I realized! If I even touched the empty bottle, I would have gone! Two moves ahead Luke! Son of a chess bastard! Can't compete with that! Nice full glass! *laughter* Almost had it!
So they hand you your flight. Take a picture.
Cool.
Wait a second. What? That's what airport left.
So.
and talk to your friend.
Would that be the last thing I want to remember? Why not? In bare knuckle straight. Exactly. Boom. Boom.
A lot bumpier than the big airlines. Much bumpier. Much bumpier.
We're alive. Alright.
To be honest I was thinking how bad could it really go actually. With that bump let's imagine one of the wings hits. What it'd be a skirt? Smaller I think it's gonna matter. I'm thinking cars. We're in the McLaren. Yeah. It's lighter and smaller. Yeah. I'm gonna see.
*sad music*
Good morning. Good morning.
How are you?
Back in! Hello!
I'm a funny light stuff!
All right, Rory. We'll see you.
What do you mean?
What do you mean? Why didn't they put me on the flight? Why haven't they got me? I know you're not allowed to leave. I'm not allowed to leave. I know, I know, but we have things to do.
What do you mean?
I mean,
Ciao. You can't leave me here. Nah, I'm sure I'll see you again, bro.
Is this the end? It can't be the end.
No way.
Can't be the end, bro.
In fact, tell that nice young lady to order me a Domino's if this is going to take one. Because Domino's in England is good.
I'm not going to do that. It was nice knowing you, Rory.
It was very nice knowing you.
I'll see you Rory. I mean,
You're in your home country. Come back.
I'm an immigrant, I believe.
Border Force might get me.
- Don't, come back. - I do. I bet you thought private plane you could get by it. - Yeah, I know.
I thought private plane, no hassle.
- Nah. - Jesus. I think that would be- - Loves a hassle. - Yeah, I could see me being bent over a table. - I take a piss. I think it was like six minutes, bro. - They're gonna probe me.
Let's take it this.
Sorry, Andrew, I fixed our problem.
What problem?
What problem?
What problem? There's zero problems. Luke asks what problem. Sorry, what problem were we just having? No, I don't know if I don't have a problem.
So we just jumped into private jet. We come here, we landed, we're waiting for our chauffeur, it takes exactly where we need to go. Our bags are outside, but there's a huge problem.
You haven't identified it. There's no problem, it's been like one minute. No, no, no, don't tell him. Don't tell him. It's only been less than a minute. Why don't you tell him in a minute? Why don't you tell him once the problem is solved? Because...
If we were hanging around people like this,
Our whole lives we didn't have each other. Problems would never get solved. Ever. Tristan fixed the problem. The problem. It's because there's no problem.
I have chips.
Thank you.
What? I'm happy. I'm very happy here.
This has been very good service. I don't know...
What do you mean? Useless.
Luke, you're bloody useless and you haven't gone.
A bloody clue.
Not a bloody clue.
I don't understand what you guys are talking about.
Problem solved.
Okay.
I can't believe Andrew, this is your cousin.
There wasn't a problem. It was a huge problem.
There we go. There was 0%. Wonderful. Thank you very much.
What do you mean?
There you go. Thank you.
You were happy with your water in the prison. No thank you, we're not that fancy.
I was very happy with my water crisps.
I'm sorry mate.
We didn't have any booze, so now we're good. The fact that he didn't identify a booze-less situation
I'm starting to have second thoughts about this one.
Not sure he can be trusted in a combat situation.