Transcript
Good shot there from Tate!
you
I don't think a private jet has ever landed anywhere, jumped straight into the transport, and said, "Take me to Marsh Farm in Luton." I was going to see you mom. This is going to be the first time in history this has ever happened. No, but for those of you who don't know what Marsh Farm in Luton is, it's the worst council estate in one of the worst cities in one of the worst countries. For the Americans, what's a council estate?
Jumping off the jet and saying, take me to the hood. It's like landing at LAX and saying, in a private jet, and asking your chauffeur, hi, take me to South Compton. Like, that's what we're doing.
From the streets.
Going back to the hotel suites. From CPT to LU3. From banging skets to private jets.
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Tristan, I need a drink.
I can fucking drink. I'll get it. It'd be real nice to be here in Trent Park tonight. Mainly because it is just nice to be anywhere.
If anyone had made me jewelry you would understand the true meaning of lockdown.
what are we doing here what is this what's driving so we got 488 which is upgraded your 458 and then we've got a gt3rs and we're gonna drive where just drive you're driving on roads
I got us, I took us a private jet to London to get us more cars, so now we can drive back in the direction we came. Where are all these people from? It's a car trip, but I have a feeling we're not going to be with them very long, but we'll see what happens. It's good to say. Tristan, why do you look disappointed? I'm not disappointed.
I'm fine.
I didn't know these existed. Where are we going? Where are we actually going? I'm guessing we're England. Must be. You don't get together with Chris and Superwitch to not leave England. They were going north. I hope so.
We're going twice. So you knew your geography going north would still be leaving England, don't I ask?
maybe we're going north. What's North Britain? Scotland. What's North Scotland? Ireland. That's what. Did you say Ireland's North of Scotland? You're a dumbass. Fuck you guys. Americans don't know anything.
I'm done talking to you guys. Alright, if we go directly. Nah, that's bullshit. I'm not talking. West, which country do we reach? If we head east, we'll get to New York by midday.
What was this? I've been tricked. Plain bread. You said you didn't want it. I ate all the bacon. I've been tricked. Yeah, welcome. Welcome to the game, Luke.
Well, I stayed from Sarni, wasn't it?
Let me tell you something. This isn't just a drive. This is a hardcore endurance event. No sleep. Speeding all day. Drinking all night. And I will not have you baby out of it.
Hiding techniques. What about naps? Are naps okay? No naps. No napping in the car. Man up.
Union and without any declaration of war his statement gave little detail our cause is just he concluded wouldn't the enemy will be beaten scared and he will be victorious scared him with my Ferrari Aikido I saw it I saw the bear in his eyes fear yeah what do you do I know nothing of course Aikido just isn't as good yeah the city of Stalingrad on the border may have been far from the fight
- He was straight, he tried to get us lemonade on, 'cause we're driving.
So there's perfectly mixed gin and tombs. This is lemonade. Perfectly mixed. It's not lemonade, Rory. It's G&T's.
Look, it's Gordon's London Dry Chin and Tonic Lemonade.
- What's that?
Thank you.
It's delicious. Lemonades are delicious. If I drink lemonade I'll be too sober to drive. If you got me lemonade I would have dehydrated. I would have been refreshed enough.
- What's up?
- No.
but trust me, he got Ajax's course. He knows how to be hydrated.
- Are we caramel-hydrating?
Tristan, that can't be in the course.
Is that a part? This can't be a part. It's true. You guys are the expert of hydration.
Andrew, I'm the best scratch card buyer in the world. I'm the best that's ever been.
I'm the best. Just accept it.
I'm getting better I'm getting better.
- This is faster. - Yep, I agree.
I'm fanning this riding super class on what the balls are now. I don't like it. Yeah.
Well the story is this, and now the side is starting to spend loads of money.
My plan was to fly to London, get hold of cars,
fly the cars to Iceland and do the Icelandic ring run. Turns out bringing cars to Iceland is basically fucking impossible.
And when I did, when I told Tristan this my plan, he goes, "Oh, that's a shame. We would have got good Instagram pictures." So I thought,
Let's go somewhere where
You can get good Instagram pictures because this is actually one of the most Instagram spots in the world.
Disneyland.
So now Tristan's crying as it lies out. He's gonna be shooting. He's gonna want Instagram pictures.
It's the most Instagram spot in the world. So now we can have a stick.
With Mickey Mouse.
- Rory's loving it. - I'm not, I don't know why we're here. What are we doing? - Rory, you're loving it, don't lie. - No, I would have loved it in 1997. - Bonjour.
No! Bienvenue at Disneyland. Why do you know how to speak French?
You're saying welcome. No!
So I did all that walking with Andrew and Rory but I realized
I forgot my ticket in the car. So today's walking day. Disneyland already blows.
you
Okay, so This is Disneyland I don't know where anyone is Because I had to do the walk of What would it call?
The March of Death They tried to kill me But make me walk back to go get my ticket
So Andrew, Tristan, and Rory Are somewhere in this park I'm going to make it my mission to find them And try and go through the oppression
impressive machine without wearing masks. We'll see. Wish me luck. I think the camera is my secret weapon.
I'm a bit of a ninja.
So this is the food and music of oppression. Just so everyone knows it's clear. This is what it looks like. This is what oppression looks like.
horrible all the place so i finally found you guys yeah you did we're going what wait what we're leaving i haven't even reached the castle yet so no one cares about you we've seen all welcome to disney hands want some no do you want to i do not want everyone there's enough for everyone do you want disney hands more than enough for everyone there's six of them right here so i told everyone
It turns out I was wrong. Hello. English. English. Isolate and sit down to eat please. Ah, we have to isolate and sit down. Okay. Sorry. Great. I'm just sit down to eat. So much fun at Disneyland. So much fun at Disneyland. Enjoy your time at Disneyland with a Stasi. Yep. That's when we'll attack you at random if you're not isolated while you're at your popcorn. It's the Stalin regime. Walt Disney's secret military police. It's communism. They did say he was a Nazi.
- They did. - They said Walt was a Nazi, and now it's starting to come true.
- The oppression. - I still haven't put it on. I'm not putting it on. Now I have to sit down to eat. You know who they made that rule up for? Us. They've been watching us off the cameras for two hours doing this to every security guy. They've been playing with a post more than us, and now they've just made up a new rule to try and get us. - The only way to get around the mask has been
pretend we're eating forever. Yeah. So I stand like this and every time the security guard comes, I go.
I'm waiting for them to say, no, you have to put the mask on. I say, okay, I want a refund. I'm going to buy six euros popcorn. Yeah. I can't fucking eat it. It's true. Sit down. They made that up for us. That's new policy. So I'm too smart. I'm a chest master. I'm circumnavigating the system of oppression. I just want a popcorn.
If you take it off, we'll kick you out.
Wait, wait, it's the security guard. Film. Oh, it's already filming. Security guard approach.
I don't even have the popcorn defense. But Rory, you know what I've been using. I've been using the film defense. If you film and you put it up and you look like you're doing things, they're often distracted.
Lazy.
Call security. Someone to tell us to leave the park. We're leaving! We are leaving. You're gonna keep us in the park? I am the virus.
No, I'm not wearing a mask. We're leaving. We're not wearing a mask. How do we leave? I don't know. Let me out. Yeah. Where's the exit? Is that the exit? Where's the exit? How do we leave? Sorti? Exit. Sorti. Where? Here?
Here? Yeah, he's saying it's this way. Around this way. Thank you.
THE END OF THE END OF THE
There's the sortie. We refuse to wear the mask. Yeah.
I refuse. Yeah. I refuse. If you want to throw down, we can go to Disney Hands. We can do Disney Hands. If they want. Disney Hands is real.
- What is the name of the name?
Yeah.
yeah see one guy was just like all right I'm not gonna be smart and just tell them where the exit is instead of holding them here everyone's calling for backup I could just let them I could just let them know how to leave. We're not wearing a mask. We're anti -mask. We don't have to put inside. Yeah we're leaving.
Is this the way I believe?
Thank you.
Thank you.
So he was trying to intimidate us on the dock. It just didn't work at all.
Listen, look, the guy literally has the military now, because...
One day someone is going to . Yeah. So look, whole-- that's FAL. That's a battle rifle. That's the rifle you take to Afghanistan.
That's a full battle rifle. Not even MP5. Not even like a sub-finger gun. That is a battle rifle. Yeah. Long range. Yeah. Cars and shit. Like, full metal jacket through the brick. Hide behind a brick wall because they'll take you out through the wall. Yeah.
but they're French so they'd run away
- No, it's really hot at all.
And because of that,
Because of that rumor, they're now the opposite and they super, super don't want to give up. So now they're, yeah, so now they're stands, yeah. When I fought the cunts, they were so like, "I would never give up!" They used to really beat their ass. Yeah.
Also, we're going to be fair to the friends, which I don't like to do, because fuck them.
But if it were to be fair to the French, it wasn't for the English channel, England, we got smoke the same.
England would have got spanked but it was a bit of water. If they were mainland along with the thing
They would have got spanked.
Thank you.
I just like to annoy all my French friends until they run away. Tom's talking about the mascots. I'm not saying, "No, I'm not wearing a mask, sorry."
- I know.
Thank you.
Shoot me. Shoot me. Shoot me. I don't want to be here.
Ladies and gentlemen,
We got him.
Thank you.
Thank you.
-
Thank you.
- Yes, sir.
Thank you.
Fun for everyone.
Fun for everyone.
Thank you.
*thud*
Yeah, one of these people who we're driving these fast cars with seems to have fucked up ahead. Yeah. Now, I hope he's crashed into a local French villager so I can see the Frenchman shouting at him as I drive back. That would be good. That would be good. What are you doing?