Transcript
*Rubble music*
Just like jail.
*music*
And that's the point of joy, the raccoon is afro-gitano. And where the man has no one, a man is emella, a dance of caña, poseed by the rhythm of the batata. And the DJ that knows him, he plays the rhythm of the 12th, for Diego, the song most desired. And the dance, and the go, and the sing.
I'm not gonna fuck a new bar.
Bitch room service oh
I'm about to service myself, you piece of shit. I'm so sick to death of Andrew and his New Year's Eve buzzkilling. Get the fuck out of my way. What am I doing? Shut up. I offered him food. It's time to booze.
Okay, he's hidden the bootsies. I haven't hidden any bootsies. Fucking hidden the boots.
Fucking mini bar in this bitch.
Thank you.
Oh
Have a light for me.
- How is?
- Thank you.
Ha ha! You have to room service it like the little coward you are. Go have some boots please!
Thank you.
Okay.
Baby.
- -
*crash*
*
-
Yes.
- One down. - Ask my brother. - Ask your brother? - Yes. - Oh, no, shut up. - What I would like is a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue Label whiskey.
and a bottle of Dom Perignon champagne. Dom Perignon, one, two.
Uh, one for now. A bottle of Dom Pagan champagne and a bottle of Blue Label whiskey with some ice, some Red Bulls, some Coca-Cola. Yeah, Blue whiskey and Dom Pagan. Yeah, of course. Yeah, that's cool. Just me, Andrew. Throw these losers some miniatures, please.
Doesn't matter what they are. I'm easy. If you really don't like what you got, I'm ready to switch a room with you. I don't give a shit.
Miniatures for the losers. Hand them out. Let me just tell you all something. You're all lucky I don't drink it. Because it would be worse.
'Cause I'd roll with him 'til 90% of the average. All right, let's go. Grab one.
I hold the camera.
Rubber note? Ha! He's cheating bro! Alex you're not cheating! I'm the cameraman! New job!
I have a new job. You haven't outsmarted the system. It's New Year's Eve. Let's go.
Take the ball. Cheers ladies. Nutritious and delicious.
Come on Marcel. Come on Marcel. What are you two ladies doing? Drink your booze. Thank you Bailey. Alright now turn the camera on Alex. No no no no. Alex. I'm eating Pringles. No.
Bringo's theme here. Sorry.
You're mixing yours with coke. You are such a nice guy.
*laughter* *laughter* Well played, well played, that was good. What?
sorry about some stuff that it it that's not very well fucking incredible
- Come on, Bert.
You understand me? It's different on the street.
- Nice look.
From the same streets. From the streets. From the same streets. From the same streets. There you are. Same streets. L-U-3. It's different. It's different. Alex, your turn. From the streets of Romania. Shit. Shit. No matter. Pressure's on now. Pressure's on now, T. No gunny. One hit. One.
- You're not? - No, no.
Pressure off! Don't last down! No you freeze!
This has become something much bigger than it should!
- I'm gonna get some shit.
- No!
I'm a street player. You guys are busy playing the cards.
and the colors
You understand? It's a numbers game. You understand me? It's different when you're playing Street Rules Uno.
For life! Can you get him?
No one can get me. No one can get me. No one can get me. No one can get me. It's different. It's different. When you play on the street, it's different. It's different. You ain't gonna do shit. You ain't gonna do nothing. It's different on the streets. It's different when you play street rules. It's different.
I am built differently. Do you understand? What does UNO mean in Spanish? Exactly. I am number one at this game. You don't hear that. When you go out to the streets, find the biggest gangster on the street, ask him about UNO and what's he going to say? Say part G. The G stands for UNO. Do you understand me? The G stands for UNO. Tactical pick up. You don't know about them moves.
Tactical pick up
G stands for UNO. I play street rules and I'm gonna win.
When you're like me, life in jail twice. When you've done life, sometimes life or death is decided with UNO games. It was me against the Mexican gang, against the Nazis, all the different races. I was there by myself. All the different colors. They had the blues, the yellows. They split it up by race. And I still won. With no colors. You understand?
That's why you can't play greens against me, you can't play blues against me, yellows and reds don't work. Okay, no greens against me. Because I was in jail for like twice because I murdered someone via UNO. I beat an UNO so bad!
They steal bread. Tristan's hungry. I'm not. I'm really full.
Alex got none. Who else got none? Alex had one piece of fish.
That's for you and Andrew. I think that's mission accomplished. It's one of the first times you actually did eat all the food before anyone else could get any. Alex had to do the fish skin in the fucking shrimp tails. To those who don't know, what's our game? Tristan ate all the food as fast as he could while all the people were doing it.
normal things like pouring themselves a drink so that no one else could eat. And he thinks he's a winner. For some reason. Skill issue. That's why I survived in the wilderness and you wouldn't. What drink is in your drinking? Motherfucker. I will strike down upon thee. Great vengeance and furious anger. Those who attempt to slow and tame my drinking. Nice. Good feature. Come on dork. Let's go.
They can't be trusted. No. I'm just hijacking all of this away from all of you. Fuck off.
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Don't worry, just eat it.
Alex eat it
Help me out!
Why would you do it again? To feed Andrew. They're kids now. Can't do that. Fuck them kids.
Bye.
Open it.
Five, four, three, two, one. Happy New Year!
Nice. Can't see him.
- Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man. - Oh, man.
- Oh, man.
*gunshot* Mark to me!
Mark to me Andrew!
Andrew, it's really important, seriously. Andrew, mark to me!
You can't do this!
Bailey, you're fucking it up! You're going to the right way! Bailey! You don't understand! You're dancing! Andrew, you can't do this! You can't! I can't! No, you can't! You ain't got the shoulders, you ain't got the hands in the right place!
Okay, he's got it now. He's got it. You can't do this. You can't do this. No, you can't do this, Youssef. No Algerians. Bailey's pure white. Bailey's the worst at this.
Why are we doing this? Why am I doing this? So you can't do it. And you can't do it.
The real world is officially now bigger than it has ever been. It is now larger than it has ever been at any point in recorded history. It was already huge, and then we went to jail, then we came out and got bigger, and now most people understand that chaos is coming for everyone in 2024 and they need to get some money, they can't sit around and be broke anymore.
The school has beaten a new record and we are larger than we've ever been. What that means is there are more people learning how to free themselves from the matrix than there have ever been before. So if you're sitting at home and you have not decided to join and learn how to escape from the matrix.
You now have more competition than you've ever had. There's more people taking up the spots, who are going to jump into the wormhole to free themselves, and you're going to stay there like a broke peon.
We get bigger and bigger, and I think the reason for that is because it's actually the only place you can learn things that matter basically in the world.
If I were to say to you, go join a school where they're going to teach you things that matter, you're going to struggle because all you're going to end up doing is joining some liberal indoctrination camp, paying a bunch of money, learning a bunch of worthless crap, taking years to do it, get in debt. This is a position and this is a situation where you can sit down and say, I want to be taught the things I need to know to live a life worth living. It's going to cost you less than a pizza and you can do it from home. And for that reason, we continue to grow and it looks like we're going to be even more monumentally successful than even I had planned. So...
It's a good day for us, it's a good day for our students, and it's a very bad day for all the losers who have not yet joined University of London.